Screening the Majors

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CC major declaration is around the corner (March 10-13th), which means that this is a grand time for sophomores to watch all of their friends oscillate between English, Anthropology, Art History, and that Stats degree their dad’s friend from high school thought they should get—only to end up declaring Political Science or Econ, of course. Don’t know what to declare? Still believe that your undergraduate, liberal arts major has any relevance to your future career? The answer to your BA might be right under your fingertips. We mean that literally if you’re holding a smartphone. Features editor and app enthusiast Alexander Pines brings you five different smartphones that correlate to fix general majors (emphasis on general and chosen basically at random/whatever seemed easiest. He would have done more, but there are only so many iPhones one can draw in a lifetime without losing it), and it’s up to you to guess which phone goes with which major. Have fun.


  • A: Computer Science. Gotta love the higher user control over an Android phone.
  • B: Creative Writing/English. Note the Tumblr app. And the coffee app. ’nuff said.
  • C: Political Science. No one but a politician would carry a CrackBerry in 2014.
  • D: Economics. Spot the Gulati reference if you can.
  • E: Pre-med/some sort of science. Bwog doesn’t know enough about science to put real apps for this. We just used Google.

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  1. roaree  

    this is offensive

  2. dumb frat guy  


    • yeah.

      Most of my fellow students at Columbia feel so divided from athletes because, once again, sports have never been a part of their life. During Friday nights in high school, they were probably in the library and not at the football game. During the Homecoming pep rally, future Columbia students were most likely working on extra homework and problem sets.

      There is nothing wrong with making those choices. But by doing so, these students are distancing themselves from a huge and important part of life. The problem doesn’t lie with the athletes, but instead the students who surround them.

      In Contemporary Civilization, we learn about the tyranny of the majority. As only 13 percent of all Columbia students, athletes are clearly in the minority. Columbia is nothing like a democracy, but at the same time, opinions reflect the manners of the majority.

      • Anonymous

        It's as if you expect these kids who spent their lunches inHS library to befriend athletes and go to some lame ass games. I think it's more that athletes isolating themselves into their own world. How can you, as anonathlete, even relate?

        It's obvious many athletes look down on these nerds (who's never been to homecoming...?), but want them to come to games to cheer for them? not like these football plyaers do well enough to be a star like in state schools, or involved in communities outside their games.

  3. SMH

    Android phones aren't jailbroken, they're rooted. Only iPhones are in jail and need to be sprung out.

  4. Anonamoose  

    The puppy is my favorite.

  5. Blunts in Butler  

    Where's the High Times app?

  6. ThatOneGuy  

    It's not offensive – it's stupid.

  7. not only is it stupid, the pics  

    are shoddily drawn as well.

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