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The 7 Deadly Columbia Sins, Or Why God Stopped Answering Your Calls

Georgina didn't fool anyone and neither are you.

Georgina didn’t fool anyone and neither are you.

In the spirit of Yom Kippur, the 25-hour fast in honor of atonement, Bwog wants to give every Columbia student a chance to fess up their transgressions and mend their ways. Let’s be honest, God’s voicemail is full, and unless you want a pile of coal in your stocking stuffer again, time to change. Since Yom Kippur is officially over, now all you can do is reflect, and take heart in knowing that someone else has been there, too.

Pride – Walking out of a midterm absurdly early and remarking rather loudly how easy it was and how you “didn’t even study.”

Envy – Shit-talking a fellow student who did better than you on said exam by mentioning his abysmal social calendar and many insecurities to all that will hear.

Wrath – Requesting to switch advisors and filing a complaint, as soon as said advisor cancels an appointment or cannot help you get into a class.

Gluttony – Letting one of your drunk friends pass out in the Mel’s bathroom because your teammate ordered a round of Tequila shots.

Lust – Sexiling your roommate during Parent’s Weekend, while your roommate’s parents are visiting.

Sloth – Sleeping through your 1:10pm Science of Psychology lecture consistently, and not even bothering to hear the class recording posted. Instead emailing the TA 21 Questions about what you missed.

Greed – Scooping up the last of the John Jay sushi and/or Ferris tater tots when there’s a long line of hungry students behind you.

Photo courtesy of CW’s Gossip Girl

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