I watched this video for over 15 minutes and still understood nothing.

Welcome back, Columbia! We hope you had a great spring break full of sun, booze, and relaxation! Or, if you stayed in NYC instead, we hope you survived the blizzard and didn’t get too sick of John JJ’s. Either way, time to check back in with today’s Bwoglines.

Happening in the nation: Today, FBI Director James Comey will be speaking before the House Intelligence Committee regarding President Trump’s wiretapping allegations. Emphasis on “allegations.” Because he has no proof. *sigh*

Happening in NYC: Jimmy Breslin, long-time famous NYC newspaper columnist, died yesterday in his Manhattan home. Breslin had won the 1986 Pulitzer Prize for Commentary, despite not always being NYC’s most agreeable voice.

Happening on campus: Today’s the day, Columbia: housing lottery numbers come out. May the odds be ever in your favor. Check the housing portal for your fate… and stay tuned for Bwog’s infamous housing reviews, coming up soon.

Overheard: “What’s worse: John JJ’s or straight guys?”

Get trippy: Over break I went on a wild trip and ended up watching YouTube videos on mandelbrots. This was my favorite.

Image and video via Mathologer.