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Senior Wisdom: Anderson Peguero II

Anderson’s poetry has made Bwog grow chest hair and sob all at once.

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Anderson Peguero II aka “dominican goth” aka “crack panther” aka Columbia College, Psychology, New York City

Claim to fame: Co-president of Bacchanal. Fiji water ambassador. Champion of Android owners. Problematic Twitter sensation. Poet. Style icon. Anime (over)enthusiast. Undisputed victor of rap beef with A$AP Twelvyy. Professional sadboi. Proud Gemini.

Where are you going? Hell.

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2023?
1. The bird noises that you hear after dark on campus are 100% fake. They play out of speakers expertly hidden by Facilities workers. It’s kind of a metaphor for the whole Columbia experience if you think about it…
2. You’d be surprised what you can get away with tweeting without getting suspended. Take risks, get those retweets, block professors, get in big dramatic online fights!
3. If you know what you want to do in your life, do it. Don’t waste time studying or working at something for someone else’s benefit. Life is short and tomorrow isn’t promised! And with that being said, take this time to explore yourself and try out everything your heart desires!

“Back in my day…” Cannon’s was still a thing. We had a few more frats. Barnard girls would hang outside JJ’s and solicit swipes. Remember Rite Aid? Party City? Amigos? I actually personally knew the [person] who hooked up with Rae Sremmurd. We still watch each other’s stories on Instagram.

Favorite Columbia controversy? Aforementioned 2016 Bacchanal aftermath, or maybe this year’s. Bacchanal is so much fun and so controversial (for some reason). Resist the campus tendency to hate on it and I think you’ll find yourself with a lot of great memories. Or you won’t, if you end up blacking out by 3. We’ve all been there.

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: Have you seen my Twitter? I hope so, because that’s really all I’ve got for this one…

What was your favorite class at Columbia? Any class by Joseph Fasano. Incredible poet and a one-of-a-kind teacher that is truly passionate about the material.

Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I’d give myself up tbh

Whom would you like to thank? Not only God, but also Jesus. It’s been a wild four years. Shouts out to the Thou Shalt Not Entertainment fam, shouts out to the Butcaf staff, shouts out to the JJ’s staff, shouts out to the halal carts… You’ve all literally saved my life many many times.

One thing to do before graduating: Get a therapist. Could end up helping you significantly more than you’d expect and save a lot of people a lot of headaches. Also: have sex in the stacks. 10/10 experience.

Any regrets? Not dropping pre med earlier. My life could have been so much easier, so much more fun, lol. Everyone thinks the world is going to end if they don’t do pre med or whatever but that’s definitely not the case. Your parents will get over it (eventually). You’ll be much happier. Really as long as health and happiness are the motivations behind everything you do, you’ll find yourself with relatively few regrets!

Edit 5/2/19, 5:42 PM: With the author’s permission, we edited the reference to Dorothy Hastings to “person,” as pronouns in use were unclear. We sincerely apologize for any confusion.

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  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous He’s never had sex in the stacks

    1. A$ says:

      @A$ not YET ;)

  • idris says:

    @idris kings only!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Is it actually true that the bird noises are fake? Why would they do that? I was looking straight at a bird late one night and watched it make sound, opening its beak at the same time as the sound was made…Or am I being stupid…

    1. anon says:

      @anon you’re being stupid

  • i says:

    @i need to meet this man fr

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous I love you anderson!! Your twitter is fire. Also i never knew that about the bird noises.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous wtf are those email signatures LMAO how do i get on the mailing list for these??

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