Shaun Wang reminds us to bring pillows to the stacks…unless you’re into that…and that pressure makes diamonds!
Name, School, Major, Hometown: Shaun Wang, CC, Art History and Business Concentration, Beijing.
Claim to fame: Beta President: Greek life crackdown’s scapegoat and benefactor to the grime within Beta’s basement
Where are you going? 4 years of undergrad only gave me a sample of Columbia’s bureaucracy. I wanted more to truly savor its bureaucratic flavor, so I’m staying for another 2 years for graduate school! Yay! I wanted the crushing economic pressure of my student loans and my bitter jealousy for my IB friends who are racking in the big bucks at the expense of their receding hairline.
What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2023?
1. You know what they say, pressure makes diamonds.” The more you procrastinate, the more pressure it is on you, and therefore, the better your essay / test results will become. Seems pretty logical.
2. Bring pillows to the stacks; its all hard surfaces my friend. Unless you’re into that…
3. Fuck the goat dude.
“Back in my day…” Canons and Bernheim were things.
Favorite Columbia controversy? Prezbo with his black Audi and his escorts of public safety cars, almost hit student on college walk…
Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: I’m a controversy.
What was your favorite class at Columbia? BIOLBC1020: Introduction to the mannerisms within getting bent over by Columbia’s Administration.
Would you rather give up oral sex or cheese? I’m lactose intolerant, but I’m still giving up oral sex for cheese.
Whom would you like to thank? That international graduate student who once gave me a cigarette outside of butler in order to alleviate my pain from finals. <3
One thing to do before graduating: Reread all of lit hum and CC books just to feel all the crushing pain again. And of course, this will all be fueled by my adderall addiction! (For my future employers: this is a satirical remark.)
Any regrets? Hundreds of printing dollars and meals swipes unspent.