1 CommentsBarnumbia students may be smart, but we’re also stupid.
That’s why, every day we open up our stupid little phones (or laptops or whatever), enter the great wide internet, and ask some very strange questions. This week, some Bwoggers and their friends took a deep dive into their internet search histories to see what we might find.
It turns out, a lot of us don’t know how to do math. So some of us have Googled “37 divided by 2” (hey, it’s been a while since we reviewed basic division) and “integral of x” (yep, that Calc 1 midterm was rough).
But math isn’t the only discipline Barnumbia students turn to the internet for help with. We also ask science questions such as “is smallpox eradicated,” “what does forty degrees actually feel like,” “wolf howl decibels,” and “liquids needed for factories.”
And, more specifically, we have a lot of medical and health questions that merit a list of their own:
-“Can I take Advil with wine?” (please don’t kill your liver).
-“Do accutane and antidepressants cancel each other out?”
-“Is crying after sex normal?”
-“Lightheaded after morning sex. Am I ok?”
-“How to tell if I’m internally bleeding?” (This happened when a Bwogger was hungover. Turns out they just needed to eat and drink water…)
-“How many bones in adult?” (Because a Bwogger thought they grew an extra bone, apparently)
But the internet isn’t only for such academic and technical questions. Barnumbia Bwoggers also looked for pop culture, memes, and just general vibes that are, of course, all totally sane:
-“Anna Taylor-Joy smoking cigarette parking lot hot”
-“im a rock chick. i like to rock out” video
-“Is mercury in retrograde all the time????”
-“not the yadas meme”
-“Playboi Carti text to speech generator”
-“Andre and his piano Victorious”
-“friendship ended with” meme
-”How tall is Andy Samberg?”
-“John Mulaney how do I write that on my taxes screencap”
-“King Kong on building silhouette”
We also had some general inquiries about life and how to get things in it.
`-”Free kittens on Craigslist”
-”most popular baby rocker”
-“yarn near me”
-“Kanye West peta lyrics” (this person was thinking of “Feedback”)
-“Dutch phrase ‘pee shoes car’”
-“Who the fuck call laundry sauce detergent?”
-“Did KidzBop actually cover Mo Bamba?”
-“song that goes La La Lalalala duh duh duh”
-“why?”
Well, that’s all for now. I’m off to Google how to conclude an article on a blog.
Okay Google via Bwog Staff
Loading …
1 Comment
@Anonymous Google is Evil! The problem with Google is not privacy which is a deliberate distraction
as privacy is even used to justify abortion. The problem is monopoly
censorship as most other search engines, even while feigning privacy, use
Google’s database. Page rank is the source of rancor because it amplifies
noise instead of producing objective results. Google scanning major
libraries has caused many libraries to close or reduce their collections.
Google also betrayed their deja news franchise by increasingly limiting and
deleting usenet newsgroup archives. Neurotic password changes and twister
verification dances actually expose security by forgeting, to only make users
more mentally unstable so AIDA marketing model shouting can coerce them, just
like date rape drugs. How does Google demand insecure Javascript on its web
sites but mess up Java on Android? NGINX, indeed! If you ask their self
driving car to take you to Dallas will it curate you to Austin instead? In
1978 Peter Grace pushed cap gains differential which spawned Apple, Amgen,
Genentech and Microsoft, but Rostenkowsky reversed it, anihilating the
patient capital model of Bessemre, Doriot, Termans and Thermo Electron,
spawning frivolous ventures like Google and Facebook and even worse,
decimating the American Beauty Rose of industry with LBOs and the elimination
of NBS/NIST standards.