Senior Staff Writer Jake Torres attended Latenite’s Spring Anthology on Thursday, December 8 at 11 pm in the Lerner Black Box.

This semester has been rough for all of us, but the light at the end of the tunnel of every semester is the new Latenite anthologies. 

For the unlucky few living under a rock, Latenite is a student organized sketch comedy and theater group that delivers a “silly goofy but deeply intimate” series of sketches in the form of anthologies at the end of every semester. This semester I was blessed to be invited and have a reserved seat for opening night, though of course I planned on attending anyway. This semester’s anthology had seven artistic and deeply thought-provoking sketches: “I Met a Guy Who Loved Nothing More Than the Lanternflies,” “Fanfiction,” “Spinach Kale Caesar: a sweetgreen orgy opera,” “Clockwork,” “A Chance Encounter,” “Freudian Slip,” and “Mile High.” 

“I Met a Guy Who Loved Nothing More Than the Lanternflies” takes a deep dive into the human psyche and brings up important points that made me question the society we live in. “Fanfiction” brings a fantasy every has had at some point to reality and makes you wish you had seen it sooner. “Spinach Kale Caesar: a sweetgreen orgy opera” is packed with raw emotion and gut wrenching drama.

“Clockwork” is a post-capitalist commentary that speaks about the hierarchical society we live in. “A Chance Encounter” is a moment where it felt as if all time had stopped and an event occurred that was destined since the creation of our universe. “Freudian Slip” follows an up-and-coming researcher sharing his profound, scientifically backed findings which had me hooked for a while. In “Mile High,” a Columbia Rowing team member learned all the safety precautions we need to take while riding an airplane. 

This semester’s anthology, like the previous two, was jam-packed with absurd, but beautiful and smart sketches. It is clear once again the directors and writers could do however they pleased with their sketches. It is commendable how they are able to take a single small idea and blow it up into a 5-15 minute creative masterpiece. This can be said especially for “Spinach Kale Caesar: a sweetgreen orgy opera” and “Clockwork.” The sweetgreen orgy opera was an emotional multi-dimensional theatrical experience that dove into the intricacies and interpersonal (or intervegetable?) connections of the salad world. “Clockwork” definitely went on for a bit of time, but with that time they were able to craft a massive world with elaborate lore that I could see myself living in like the characters. 

This semester, it feels they upped the ante with explicit sketches and really embodied the goal of Latenite on the back of the program notes and content warning at the beginning of the show of “being sexy af,” to no complaints whatsoever, hence the title of the article. I could feel the intense emotional connection between the two presidents in “Fanfiction,” partly due to how far they were willing to go to show their feelings for one another. “Clockwork” showed no shame in enjoying feet, which I will leave up to you to decide how you feel about that. “Mile High” is exactly what you think it is and was accompanied by powerful moans that could have been felt throughout Lerner. 

It seemed like there was less movement on stage during this semester’s anthology, but it made everything that did happen more impactful, like in “A Chance Encounter,” which was slow but calculated to be delivered in the most moving way. Igor Balitsky was, once again, on point with the lighting. Flipping the switch during “Freudian Slip” was a great idea and really did feel like Sigmund had been defeated. It was also a cool idea to use candles during the “Lanternflies” sketch as a more unique way of lighting the scene. 

Some standout actors were Lucas Lugones (SEAS ’25), Brock Walker (GS ’24), Maxfield Parson-Scherban (SEAS ’23), Drew Sirenko (CC ’23), Leul Abate (CC ’23), Hayley Lugg (BC ’23), Ashley Albinus (BC ’25), Matt Pierson (CC ’25), Susannah Yezzi (CC ’24), Shania Pahuja (BC ’24), and Toby Kreiman (CC ’23). Lucas and Brock as the presidents was a perfect fit and both were able to bring all of our erotic fantasies to reality with ease, especially when Brock hopped on the box. Maxfield and Drew as chicken, roasted and mushroom, roasted respectively were able to showcase a deep rooted rivalry in just a short time. When Maxfield dawned the mask it was as if he was a different person or being. Leul somehow managed to stay in character the whole time during the sweet green opera with a stoic face and strong will. 

Hayley, Ashley and Matt also somehow stayed in character while performing probably the most nonsensical sketch we have seen yet. Listening to them talk sent me back to University Writing in my freshman year which always felt like a fever dream, as did Clockwork. Susannah as Sigmund was a great casting. You could feel the distraught and agony going through her head as her idea that would revolutionize psychology was instantly stomped on, for no reason at all, and the relief when Sigmund sees his mom again. Shania made sure we were all well aware of how we can be safe and well protected on a flight. Toby managed to remain as a silly goofy little guy after he got special service from first class and finished off with a powerful “thanks.”

Once again, there’s something for everyone here, whether you’re into lanternflies, vegetables, presidential erotica, feet, motherly figures, the states of Idaho or Iowa, or planes, Latenite has it all. The Fall 2022 Anthology was a great mix of what makes Latenite so awesome with a barrage of hilarious moments and profound allegories.

Tonight’s prank show is the last show of this semester and I will definitely be going again! If you are unable to make it, I highly recommend checking Latenite out next semester! It’s something every Columbia student has to experience at some point! Stay up to date with the Latenite instagram, as that’s where they announce show information and ticket links, which sell out very quickly. If you are not able to get a ticket, you can always join the standby line, which a lot of people normally get off of. I am looking forward to seeing it again tonight and seeing what they come up with next semester!

Stroke of genius via Latenite