Forcing students to take tests about things they don’t believe in is an unacceptable form of compelled speech.
How many courses at Columbia University have asked that you answer test questions that assume global warming is a proven fact? Although there’s only correlational evidence, we are often asked to believe that human industrialization is the root cause of rising temperatures. Further, we are mandated to perceive the earth as round, when many still fervently feel it is flat.
Underlying your earth science professor’s obsession with the melting of ice caps being bad for rocks or whatever is support for a political ideology that oil, coal, and gas companies, the very foundation of our brilliant and bustling economy, are responsible for crazy weather phenomena.
I myself believe that humans and whatever cosmic forces control us on puppet strings are simply preparing for the end times prophesied in a 1960s Science article. They got it right. I don’t want to be coerced into renouncing my staunch beliefs by answering a question that assumes them invalid. This institution claims to support a diversity of opinions yet pushes me into acknowledging ‘truths’ I disagree with. Free speech is guaranteed in our constitution, yet Columbia University uses its institutional power to suppress certain viewpoints, creating a toxic echo chamber.
If you’ve been outside this winter, I’m certain you’ve noticed the unbearable wind gusts and perpetual frigidity of the last few weeks. The Sisyphean uphill climb to class each day through raging tempest, sharp and crisp even through layers of wool, Canada Goose, and balaclavas should be proof enough that the severity of global warming is an egregious falsehood perpetuated by the very same cabal of coastal elite lizards that control the news broadcasts. If Columbia were to force all of its students to publicly support Joe Biden, many would feel as if that is a violation of their individual rights and freedoms. In asking test questions that clearly enforce political stances, Columbia turns us into unquestioning clones, unable to think and speak freely. Take the Red Pill. It is repulsive that we are asked questions that force us to accept controversial beliefs or not answer and be made fun of for having said beliefs. Columbia is supposed to be a safe space for all viewpoints.
This year I urge all of you to boycott all environmental science global warming-related classes and physics classes that subscribe to the foolish notion that the world is a globe. For all we truly know, we’re living on a giant raisin in the palm of a vengeful god, seconds away from getting munched. Remember, factories are our friends, recycling is a scam, and for our campus to be truly free, we must prevent professors with years of experience from asking us questions we can just choose not to answer.
Lovely Smoke Stacks via Author and Friend.
7 Comments
@Chuck I just spent the last two months (including at least half of my vacation) reviewing the Fifth National Climate Assessment. I needed a good laugh. Thanks!
But why stop there? Do you really believe in “imaginary numbers”? I mean, even math majors call them imaginary. Or, fantasy literature, music appreciation (there is music I don’t appreciate!), political science- have you taken a look at congress lately, and microbiology – are we really sure that microscopes are not just showing us what the professor wants us to see? Last but not least, statistics- lies, damn lies, and statistics.
Ah to be young again!
@Anonymous This article is a joke right ?
@Anonymous yes!
@Juliana Try and do some research yourself. Read about exxon, shell and other fossil fuel companies already know about climate change and invested millions to deny their knowledge to the general public. Try to think and read about science objectively and with an open mind, why else would you go to university when you dont trust science. Better find another job or study then.
@Anonymous Read the tags its ok
@Anonymous Is this a joke? It’s a joke right? No serious person would write this kind of drivel.
@it says satire on the post read the tags