Coil stovetops are ugly. They are dirty and they just suck.

Columbia housing means Columbia cooking which means Columbia OVENS. Now, I don’t know a single person who has truly lucked out all four years. So, while I am grateful to live in my present dorm in my single, I HATE the presence of those ovens.

As a junior, I’ve encountered many cooktops and ovens in my time. I’ve seen gas in Hartley, electric in Carlton, and now I’ve faced the inevitable—COIL stoves.

If there was a tier list of stoves, COIL would be at the bottom. Besides the sheer ease with which it accumulates dirt, its presence is sickening. Why not commit to a full electric? Watching those coils slowly turn red sends a shiver down my spine. I walk around the corner into my kitchen every day filled with vitriol. I can’t stand it. 

It doesn’t deserve to be there. How am I going to clean it? How am I going to cook properly? The coils are going to heat all the way to hot when I put it on medium and I can’t do anything about it. I’m not going to lie, having a broiler is pretty cool, but when I look at that oven I hate it. 

Look, I understand roaches, I understand scrapped wood, I understand tile with grout stains, but I don’t understand why we still have these ovens. If I want to boil a pot of water, I shouldn’t be subjected to watching these coils heat up and cool down. You know what though? I also hate electric cooktops. I have never encountered one singular cooktop that can properly heat up to a “medium” temperature. We had TWO cooktops in Carlton last year, and I still couldn’t properly find the right heat. But you know what? At least we could clean them. 

What do I do with these coils? How do I enjoy cooking, knowing that they are just right there, staring at me?

I mean, look at that coil. How do I even clean that? How do I even cook on that? 

Coil stovetops don’t deserve to be at Columbia. We are better than this, stronger than this. Let us clean our stoves without spending hours looking up tutorials and buying cleaning supplies. We deserve respect, we deserve more. 

I feel like I can’t really go on without repeating myself but I wish I could. I will update this if I ever manage to clean it.

Stove via Bwarchives

Coil-up close via Author