6 Comments
The ramps are connected by more useful stairs
We have all experienced the awful maze that is Lerner, and know that the only thing it’s useful for is Glass House Rocks and questionably cool architecture. Well, now it’s useful for parodies! Toni Airaksinen, BC ’18, makes a guest appearance and gets creative with a spin-off of Blondie’s “Heart of Glass.” Follow her lyrics below and sing along!
Once I swiped in—it was a blast
Soon turned out, I was in a House of Ramps
Seemed like the real thing, only to find
No couches, desks or study space in sight
Once I had bubble tea, and it was divine
Only for $4.95
Seemed like the real thing but I was so blind and
The Pasta Line has everyone losing their minds
In between
This building is so confusing, I’m not feeling fine
Nothing but ramps and glass inside
No actual study space and no piece of mind
At least if I fear the tourists, I know they just can’t
Swipe inside
Once I was in the Piano Lounge, and it was a blast
Then guy in Cornell hoodie found the piano, and I was sad
Seemed like his music was okay, only to find
His Beethoven got me losing my mind
Once I was eating outside Ferris and I was feeling fine
Soon found out—about the Package Line
Seemed like it was moving fast—but I was blind
Soon found out, my meal was ill-timed
Lost inside
This building is so confusing, I’m not feeling fine
Nothing but ramps and first-years complaining about FroSci
No actual centralized ‘hub’ and no piece of mind
At least if I fear the tourists I know they just can’t
Swipe inside
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6 Comments
@F Wait but seriously though, if anyone wears a Cornell hoodie on this campus they’re dead.
@F “At least if I fear the tourists I know they just can’t/ Swipe inside’ SO TRUE
@Sunday Girl Where is this cold concrete prison located?
@That proves it. One way or another, Bwog’ll find ya. They’re gonna gitcha gitcha gitcha gitcha.
@Anonymous If you really want to see cool ramps, check out Columbia’s new medical school building under construction at the med school campus.
@Anonymous More ramps? Seriously? If Columbia’s basically going to displace half of Harlem they should at least make good use of the space!
If Lerner’s ramps creates a places with no study space, what will a medical school building with ramps look like? No doctors offices? No study rooms? No MRI machines? Come on now Columbia, get your shit together.