Your girls @ Blossom du Jour praising the lord for milkshakes

It’s finally fucking cold out; and what better way to celebrate than with milkshakes? Bwog Dailies Sarah Dahl (vegetarian) and Emma Seely-Katz (vegan) couldn’t agree more, which is why they took on the 2Girls1Snack mission to review various Manhattan milkshakes. Sluuurp!

Champs (vegan shakes), 197 Meserole Street, Brooklyn

We were predisposed toward this place because their breakfast food is So Good (there’s a dish called the “Drunken Cowgirl” and the taste is almost as excellent as that name). Unfortunately, the milkshakes were eight bucks each, and for that kind of money, we expected Barack Obama himself to let us do milkshake body shots off of his abs. Alas, Obama was nowhere to be found and we were left feeling like Vincent Vega in Pulp Fiction, bewildered at our capitalist society’s commodification of simple pleasures. An interesting note: “Vincent Vega” autocorrects to “Vincent Vegan.” Is Quentin Tarantino pushing a vegan agenda? Anyway, it’s worth a trip to BK for a vegan brunch at champs but if you’re craving milkshakes, look elsewhere.

Cost: $8.00

Rating: 2/5

Tom’s (vegetarian shakes), 112th and Broadway

Okay so you’ve been to Tom’s before (high), and you’ve probably (maybe?) indulged in a shake or two. But have you tried Tom’s shakes sober? They’re just as good, if not better; a testament to their true quality. Plus, you don’t even need to drop $5.50 on subway fare there and back. You can walk! Tom’s is open til 1:30 am Sun-Wed, and 24 hours Thurs-Sat. Sarah recommends the cookies & cream shake.

Cost: $6.50

Rating: 4/5

Blossom du Jour (vegan shakes), 449 Amsterdam Ave

You could probably come away from this milkshake situation with negative net calories, but only if you’re ambitious and choose to jog down to 82nd street (Blossom’s closest location to campus). We make a point of not exercising here at Bwog, so we elected to take the subway. After tasting the milkshakes, however, it became clear that a 30-block sprint would be worth it for the exquisite delicacy that is a Blossom Du Jour milkshake. We hear all you naysayers: a milkshake without milk? Trust us, take one sip of their Butterfingers shake, loaded with salty peanut butter and chewy bits of chocolate, and milk will seem like peasant’s fare.

Cost: $6.50

Rating: 5/5

McDonald’s (vegetarian shakes), 104th and Broadway, MLK and Broadway, 354 W125th St

Yes, we are including McDonald’s shakes, because they’re value-conscious and delicious. And with three locations all a healthy walk from campus, you can get some exercise there and back (and, again, save the subway fare). Whether you go for classic vanilla, chocolate, or strawberry, or opt for a Shamrock Shake or a McFlurry, you will be cheaply pleased. They also sell frappes, but as New Englanders, we were too snobby to try them. The 104th location is open 24/7, MLK location 8 am-11 pm, and the 125th location 6 am- 12 am. Sarah recommends a McFlurry with OREO® cookies.

Cost: $1.79-$2.99

Rating: 4/5

Hot chicks via Sarah’s iPhone 6 camera