So cliché, photo via Wikimedia Commons

Sitting next to two girls eating lettuce with balsamic vinegar and wearing the same brown boots and sweaters:

“I just feel like birthdays are so cliché.”
“Wait, why is no one washing their face?  Is it National Don’t-Wash-Your-Face Day?”

After some thought…

“I’m a pseudo-vegetarian.  But doesn’t that apply to fish as well?”