Daily Archive: September 6, 2017

Sep

6

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Bwog Symposium (Colorized)

Do you want to work in a newsroom held together mostly by an internal listserv and snacks from Trader Joe’s? Do you have what it takes to be witty and comical on demand, yet also able to immediately cover breaking news at any moment? Do you want to write news without selling your soul for work study that never materializes? Do you desire journalistic independence from Columbia, so that your writing can escape the university’s (informal) censors?

Well you’re in luck, because Bwog is accepting new Daily Editors for the 2017-2018 school year. As a Daily, you’ll essentially be in charge of the whole site for one day each week, writing and editing articles, scheduling posts, and yelling at lazy staff writers and editors who haven’t finished their pieces yet. It’s a lot of power, and Dailies as such are the cornerstone of the entire Bwog structure. You’ll also be able to put “WordPress” and “basic HTML” on your LinkedIn skills, attend our notorious DWBs, and reenact our favorite LitHum text—Symposium.

The application, which is included below, is due by 11:59 PM on Friday, September 15th; email your apps to editor@bwog.comHave fun, kids.

About Bwog:

  • Tell us about one Bwog post you liked, one post you didn’t like, and why for both.
  • What is your favorite tag?
  • Come up with three sample post ideas that you would like to see on Bwog.
  • Draw Bwog.

About you:

  • Why do you want to join Bwog?
  • What do you think Bwog is?
  • You’re taking Bwog out on a date! What would you do? Where would you go?
  • What about Columbia might you be interested in writing about?
  • Send us a screenshot of the open tabs on your browser.
  • What three days work best for you to Daily?

Sep

6

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Us in AP on the first day of class.

The answer is…probably yes. We’re still at the beginning of the add/drop period, but as you shop seminar after lecture after colloquium, keep these tips in mind when you’re deciding whether or not to take a class.

To drop?

  • If the professor uses too many academic words and is generally verbose–you will fall asleep as the semester continues.
  • If the professor assigned reading before the damn class began
  • If the classroom is on a Hamilton floor higher than 5
  • If there are more than three midterms (~Mowsh Bio~)
  • If the professor prefers that you not eat in class
  • If the professor assigns their own expensive-ass book
  • If your ex is in the class and he leaves class 5 minutes early so he can avoid you
  • If it’s Advanced Programming

To add?

  • If there are field trips!
  • If you can drop a quiz/homework/test/whatever
    • Related: if there’s no final
  • If the professor provides cookies for the final (Prof. Mercer for Philosophy and Feminism!)
  • If you got in off the waitlist
  • If there’s a TILF–TA I’d like to fuck.

Sep

6

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I’m sorry I’m really bad at making starter packs

We might all think we’re special and unique, but the fact of the matter is that we Columbia students are all sort of similar. If you feel attacked by this post, or don’t, let us know why in the comments below.

A typical Columbia student on any given day is wearing Stan Smiths (dirty) or Timbs (clean). The jeans (mom or dad, either variety) are cuffed and paired with an obscure vintage t-shirt or a crop top. A thrifted neon (pink or yellow) windbreaker hangs over the shoulders, laden with the weight of the world and the sorrows of humankind. A rolled cigarette (filter optional) is in one hand, and a volume of Kerouac or Plato in the other.

Contrary to this alternative look, this student is majoring in something mainstream that Wall Street likes: financial economics, political science, or economics. However, as a high school senior, eager to fulfill a dream of Ivy League elitism in any way possible, they applied as a South Asian Comparative Literature major with a concentration in Slavic Studies. They will tell you they love Tolstoy, but Sparknoted Crime and Punishment in Lit Hum. Perhaps they consider themselves above Dostoevsky’s brand of Russian angst. It’s a well-known fact that red meat increases the chances of getting cancer, so this student is vegan, but you can catch them on a Saturday night downing shots of cheap tequila infused with ecstasy or cocaine (disclaimer: Bwog does not condone the use of illegal drugs or underage drinking).

Despite a Twitter full of anti-capitalist memes and communist article retweets, there is a Morgan Stanley or Goldman Sachs entrance test prep book hidden away in this student’s bookshelf in Wien, Ruggles, or EC. Or alternatively, they live in Greenborough but never recycle or compost back home. They will tell you that the trolley lever definitely should be pulled, but will demonstrate immense outrage at the immorality of Omelas.

Columbia Student starter pack via Youngweon Lee

Sep

6

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We love blue footed boobies.

It’s Wednesday, my dudes. And the second day of school, but, really, the fact that it’s Wednesday is more relevant to our misery. So why don’t you sit back, relax, and enjoy today’s edition of Bwoglines.

Happening in the world: Some eastern bloc countries of the European Union are expecting bad news from the European Court of Justice. The court is expected to reveal their decision tomorrow regarding these countries’ refusal to host relocated migrants arriving from the Middle East and North Africa, a decision which most believe will repudiate the countries. Whether these countries will actually listen to the EU’s top court is a separate issue entirely. (Reuters)

Happening in the nation: Hurricane Irma is continuing to barrel towards Puerto Rico and Florida. With 185 mile per hour winds, the hurricane is well over the threshold of level 5 categorization, though exact predictions regarding where and when Irma will make landfall are up in the air. Some counties have already begun evacuations, while others are seeing rapidly increased demand for staple goods and supplies. (CNN)

Happening in NYC: Madison Square Park will be hosting a new art exhibit entitled Whiteout. The “luminous white carpet of LED lights” will consist of hundreds of suspended orbs with LED lights contained within them. And as Gothamist points out, it does look eerily similar to Tesla’s experiments in The Prestige. (Gothamist)

Happening on campus: At the College of Physicians and Surgeons (up at Columbia Med School), acclaimed cartoonist Bob Mankoff, formerly of the New Yorker and currently and editor for Esquire, will be speaking about the intersection of humour and illness. Mankoff, among other things, has the most popular New Yorker cartoon of all time—and we know how Columbia students just love the New Yorker.

Overheard: A series of quotes from Adam Cannon’s first Intro to Java lecture of the year:

“You need a textbook because you’re insecure.”
“Everybody thinks they’re underprepared for this class and that they will do above average—that’s just a New York attitude.”
“People have hired me to do their homework before.”
“[About cheating] I do take it personally. Why else would I be trolling the internet for those people trying to find someone to do my class’ homework for them?”

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