not even harvey can stop me

Have you been trapped in your house for the past four days with dwindling food and water? Do you feel like you’re about to lose your mind because your cable’s been out for the past five? Are you starting to get nervous about the fact that the airport is three feet under water and you’ve got a flight to Columbia in two days? No worries, we’ve all been there and this fellow Houstonian is here to help you get out this category five disaster to make sure that you get to campus safe and sound!

1. Call your local airport and beg them to let you on the next flight. Insist that you have to meet the Campus Storage guys on Saturday morning otherwise you’ll never be able to move into your McBain double on time and your year will never recover from this set back. Try crying a little if that doesn’t work, and while they might tell you that the planes won’t be able to take off for at least another week, don’t take no for an answer until they hang up on you.
2. Next call Columbia in a panic and explain your situation in explicit detail. Smile a little when they give you pity in hopes that they’ll give you work study or pay for what’s gonna be a hella expensive flight. When the awkward silence hits between you and the receptionist, hang up without hesitation.
3. Now you’re options are pretty limited, but luckily the water’s starting to recede so the highways out of the city have opened up. Give the Austin airport a ring and book a flight ASAP! The tickets maybe expensive but those Columbia blue skies are waiting for you and there’s no way Harvey can stop you.
4. When the water turns on shove all your clothes into the washing machines in desperate hopes of being able to do a year’s worth of laundry in six hours. Don’t even bother with dryer sheets, just hope nothing turns out pink.
5. Somehow get your parents to agree to drive you the three hour journey to Austin, and don’t forget to stop at that sketchy gas station and get a slushie for the road.
6. Get on your flight and realize that a bunch of other fellow Columbians had the same idea and share your Harvey™ stories while you take off.
7. When you land at JFK remind yourself that you’re luckier than most who went through this awful tragedy and be thankful for what you have and the support system around you that allowed you to get through this horrifying experience. Remind yourself that Columbia is a wonderful and safe place, and while stress culture can take it’s toll, you know that that’s only because of the privilege we have.
8. Be a good person and donate to the Red Cross to help victims of Hurricane Harvey and Irma!

Image via Bella, obv, because she was freaking there

The Magical Musicians

New Bwogger Jacob Snyder dives into the greatly unappreciated world of on campus string performances and finds a solid gem.

The artistically-inclined Columbia student would be making a dire mistake to ignore all that our own Miller Theater has to offer. From Christmas music of the English Renaissance to jazz piano, from Euripides to Steve Reich—these are only a few of the events sponsored last year by that theater around the corner.

Students might object that ticket prices tend to stand in the way of attendance, but even the most frugal Columbian could find no excuse to miss out on Miller’s pop-up concert series. Since 2012, the theater has put on intimate showcases of young talent performing for an audience seated onstage with them. These pop-ups are free events, and audiences are invited to have a drink and mingle with such refreshing musicians and composers after the show.

On Tuesday, the Argus Quartet made their Miller Theater debut to kick off the 2017-2018 season in the first pop-up concert of the year. The string quartet has been selected as Graduate Quartet in Residence at Julliard, and their technical prowess and supreme instrumental control was fully clear throughout the four pieces they played Tuesday evening. The first composition, called For David Lang, began frantically and explosively, with violist Dana Kelley stop-starting a melody with almost mathematical precision. Proving to be a crowd favorite, the third piece, Peculiar Strokes, was introduced by violinist Jason Issokson as “a set of miniatures,” and while the piece consisted of fun technique demonstrations, it appeared to require equally exact timing and coordination.

Banjo?

President Beilock speaking in Riverside Church.

Barnard’s Convocation of the 2017-2018 school year took place yesterday afternoon, in Riverside Church. Normally Bwog wouldn’t cover this annual ceremony, but this year, it was touted particularly highly as the first time President Sian Beilock would address the student body, so we sent new writer Ramisa Murshed, BC ‘21, to the event, along with senior staffer Betsy Ladyzhets, BC ‘19. The ceremony was also contextually charged this year by a simultaneous rally outside Barnard’s gates.

At 4:30 pm on Tuesday afternoon, Barnard students, administration, faculty, and staff gathered at Riverside Church for Convocation. Although many Barnard students tend to forgo attending Convocation, this year’s event was expected to have a larger turnout than it did since, as emphasized throughout the ceremony, it was Barnard’s first ceremony with new President Sian Beilock. In fact, all Barnard classes in the 4 to 6 pm time frame were cancelled yesterday, in order to encourage students and faculty to attend. But the church was far from packed – the student section was filled with empty seats. And the ceremony that followed, while in many ways inspiring, rang hollow when we considered the context of the speeches we heard.

Biology professor Jonathan Snow (last year’s Emily Gregory Award Recipient) opened the ceremony by welcoming the SGA, faculty, Board of Trustees, senior leadership, President of the Alumnae Association, Provost and Dean of the Faculty, Chair of the Board of Trustees, the keynote speaker, and finally, the President, whose arrival elicited a great amount of cheering and clapping from the audience. However, the alumnae class officers, who marched immediately afterward, received an even greater amount of applause.

Jolyne Caruso-FitzGerald BC ’81, Chair of the Board of Trustees, then greeted the members of the audience, calling this academic year the beginning for both the class of 2021 and President Beilock. She was followed by Jyoti Menon BC ’01, President of the Alumnae Association, Provost and Dean of the Faculty Linda Bell welcomed students while also welcoming President Beilock. Her remarks, similarly to those of the speakers who preceded her, followed the overarching theme of changing the world and growing and changing at Barnard. Next, Angela Beam BC ’18, SGA President, took the podium to discuss the student side of change at Barnard – but not before taking the time to once again welcome President Beilock, whom Beam called “our fearless leader.” Beam described specific instances of students facilitating change, beginning with Divest Barnard, and then detailing Barnard’s efforts to improve food and security through meal plans, the addition of guest swipes, and partnering with the Columbia Food Bank.

But what did Beilock say?

The building where the (GS) magic happens

Last night, the General Studies Student Council (GSSC) met in the Lerner Satow room for the first time this academic year, as the executive council laid out their plans for the upcoming weeks and months. New Guest Writer Matt Coulson attended the meeting, and covered all the highlights below.

To open things off, new council president, Samantha Demezieux, promised to keep the meeting brief, with the understanding that everyone had at least 500 pages of reading still to do. Following that, Demezieux went on to give a quick update on the current state of the Council. Highlights include:

• The GSSC does not currently have a full council, and is still looking for students to take seats on the Council. Interested students can either refer to an email sent out by Demezieux on September 5 or the GSSC Facebook page for information on how to apply.
• The GSSC is committed to increasing its involvement and inclusion with the larger General Studies community. Demezieux intends to sit down with all of the student leaders of recognized and unrecognized clubs at least twice a semester.
• A renewed commitment to working closely with Dean Awn, and in quickly establishing a rapport and relationship with his replacement, when they are selected.

Updates on GSSC’s various committees are after the jump

No Columbia boys allowed. (JUST KIDDING)

Good morning, Columbia! Hopefully by now all your classes are getting a bit more settled and you’re starting to (somewhat) get your shit together. But if not, then it’ll happen soon… hopefully. Regardless, here’s today’s Bwoglines.

Happening in the nation: People living in the Caribbean are now dealing with the aftermath of Hurricane Irma; they’re currently facing a dire shortage of food and water. Here’s how you can help.

Happening in NYC: Incumbent Mayor Bill de Blasio won the Democratic primary last night for this year’s mayoral election with an overwhelming 74.6% of votes.

Happening on campus: Tonight from 7:30 to 8:30 pm in Roone Auditorium is the Community Impact Open House. Stop by to explore the plethora of volunteer service clubs at Columbia that are dedicated to giving back to Morningside Heights. There will also be pizza!

Overheard in Diana: “Wait, are you sure I’m allowed to be in here?” -a Columbia boy.

Check out this video of Jenny Slate talking about smoking weed at Columbia. 

The Diana Center via Barnard