Brunch

Just one more Music Hum final….

Bwogline: You go, Angelia Jolie.

Finals tip: The Morton Williams gummy worms not only have smiles BUT little A’s stamped on them. Start inhaling them in the hope that ingesting A’s will be the same as receiving them from your professors.

Procrastinate: Nostalgic seniors? This may make you cry.

Overheard: A budding Music Hum-er:

Little girl: *starts singing Heart and Soul*
Mom: That’s not classical.
Girl, indignantly: It’s close enough!

 

Finals advice via Wikimedia

Eh.

NYU opens a new campus, in a nicer location than the both the Village and Abu Dhabi. (Funny Or Die)

People will buy the weirdest shit, including an EKG of when Neil Armstrong stepped on the moon. (7News)

Honey Boo Boo’s parents exchanged vows. (USA Today)

Scientists have found a new species of Theropodfbnakdf. (PlanetSave)

How lucky you feel when Honey Boo Boo’s mom is married via Shutterstock

Click for the answer to the question in the title.

A virgin margarita from the Heights

Apparently Low steps is one of the best places to celebrate Cinco de Mayo—not like you’ll have time to celebrate though. (Gothamist)

You might not remember anything from this past semester of Lit Hum, but you’ll probably remember the life lessons that Full House taught you. (Buzzfeed)

We all check our Facebooks after hammering out a paper paragraph, but the habit is actually making you 20% dumber. (Nytimes)

How much sleep do you actually need? Unfortunately for those who will be watching the sunrise in Butler this week, the answer isn’t zero. (Huffington Post)

The most effective study tool via Wikimedia Commons

Bwog last night

NYU Abu Dhabi students complain about their beach resort campus. Ahhh, what might have been! (New York Mag)

New York families do crazy things for their kids’ education. (New York Times)

The plight of the middle class put to music. (Buzzfeed)

Seriously though, admission at the 9/11 Memorial. (Gothamist)

Bwog’s first world problem… Getting white girl wasted and sleeping through Bwoglines.

Bwog’s life via Shutterstock

are these your trusted friends

A new Google Glass app, Winky, allows you to take photos just by winking. (Tom’s Hardware)

Popes hang out with “four consecrated women.” Apparently they will live next to each other in the Vatican, bumping into each other “on walks.” (USA Today)

Facebook develops a feature called “Trusted Contacts,” which allows your friends to help you remember your password. The problem is, you need at least three of them. (Ars Technica)

Slain. (The Independent)

Hair via Wikimedia Commons

Official choice of badasses everywhere

Think those bright colors are funny, do ya? Think that music is somethin’ to smile about? Well wipe that smirk off your face goddammit because driving an ice-cream truck is no joke. Those guys will mess you up. (Yahoo)

A couple of days ago, rapper Danny Brown got a little… erm… closer to his fans in an incident that immediately blew up (hah! See what I did there?) in the media. Whether you think he deserves a high-five, a punch in the face, or a comforting hug, his tour-mate, Kitty Pryde, has some intelligent opinions on what went down. (Kingpin, Noisey)

What do you get when you combine zombies, worms, and acid? Bwog’s least favorite creature (besides the frankenfish, obviously) and the worst nightmare of whales everywhere. Sometimes, nature is just the worst. (Discovery, NY mag)

Aren’t you glad you’re not in Colorado or Wyoming? Go outside, enjoy the sunlight, and laugh at all your friends who go to school in the West. (CS Monitor)

don’t act like a little bitch via Shutterstock

Spec after a long night

Hey seniors: don’t graduate without crossing this off your bucket lists–one of Spec’s favorite hobbies! (Spectator, The Blue and White)

If you see this frankenfish in Central Park, you should kill it before it eats your babies homework. (DEC, NY Mag)

Obama’s to-do list: close Guantánamo Bay. “Why are we doing this?” (NY Times)

Spectator’s advice of the week, from an office memo: “We need to remember that we’re students writing for fellow students, and the best way to alienate our audience is to act like we’re above it.” (Spectator)

But, on a more serious note, a Columbia dental student was reportedly raped—be careful. (Gothamist)

Spec forgot to put on lipstick via Shutterstock

This ski jumper has no fear. Become this ski jumper.

NBA player Jason Collins became the first openly gay male athlete in a major US sport yesterday. (Sports Illustrated)

Some terrier owners in NYC are reviving the sport of hunting by having their dogs chase down rats in alleys. Tally-ho! (WSJ)

Worried about your messed-up, only-two-hour-naps-as-needed sleep schedule? Don’t be. It’s perfectly natural, according to science. (BBC)

An online dating site has offered the town of New Canaan, Connecticut, nearly $10 million to change its name to SugarDaddie.com. There’s basically no downside here. (NC Advertiser)

Getting a tattoo on yourself takes a bit of commitment. Getting a tattoo on your dog, however, will only last for the dog’s lifetime! (DNAinfo)

Sochi 2014 contestant via Wikimedia

Breaking: global warning only affects Southern Hemisphere.

Danny Brown apparently would give up cheese, even at his concerts (AllHipHop)

Pyongyang’s lights are heating up, unlike the rest of North Korea. (ABC News)

Chris Brown’s father thinks his son’s relationship with Rihanna might end badly. Really, what gave it away? (NY Daily News)

The core is getting hotter—this time it’s the real thing. (BBC News)

The world on finals via Shutterstock

Drugs: they’re in our DNA!

Canada to conduct study using MDMA to treat patients with PTSD. Bwog’s reaction: OMFG! (Vice)

Last night President Obama must have been on some serious shit. Either that or Daniel Day Lewis is even better than we thought. (The Guardian)

Bwog is now officially ten times more terrified for its mandatory drug test. (Gawker)

Enabling you via Shutterstock

Whut, how can a human be this perf?

Blue Ivy is growing up and starting to look like her mom—whut, not fair. (Usweekly, Twitter)

Apparently cheese patterned fabric exists. Whut. (Buzzfeed, Kraftbrands)

A gang member was running a kids party business.  Renting ponies from gangasters, whut. (Gawker, Youtube).

A Missouri lawmaker wants to ban seersucker suits. Whut—wait just kidding, this actually makes sense. (Chicagoist)

Blue Ivy= Columbia, amirite? via Wikimedia Commons

bet you don’t remember what this looks like

The core of the earth is fucking hot. (BBC)

Einstein was proven right, again. (Science World Report)

A NASA rover draws a dick on the surface of Mars.(Dvice)

Saturn will be easily visible when you’re high on a roof stargazing this weekend. (Space.com)

Not the phone via Shutterstock

Bwog’s vehicle of choice

The Rock isn’t going to let surgery get him down (or prevent him from looking totally ridiculous). (Yahoo)

Just in time for Earth Week! New York has expanded its recycling program, so stop throwing your goddamn plastic bottles down the trash chute. (Wall Street Journal)

In true testament to how awesome people can be sometimes, a community came together to rescue a humpback whale stranded off the coast of Mexico. Don’t worry — Bwog speaks whale. (GrindTV)

On a more serious note, a factory collapsed in Bangladesh yesterday, killing at least 149 people. (CBS)

Free Willy via Shutterstock

He tried to do Bieber’s hairstyle.

Bieber’s capuchin monkey, Mally, though still stuck in better hands with the Munich Animal Protection League, might go to a zoo soon. (Entertainment News)

France became the 14th nation to approve same-sex marriage, and this little girl is adorable! (NY Times)

Party with Petraeus in NYC beginning next August, as he’s been named visiting professor at CUNY’s Macaulay Honors College. (CNN)

Columbia Dartmouth protests, and cancels classes, for “the value of diverse opinions.” (The Dartmouth)

Still, Columbians couldn’t be “jaded” without Shakespeare. (Buzzfeed)

Baby Bieber via Shutterstock

With all this “go green” stuff I don’t know how this isn’t a thing yet.

Earth Day is here! (Google)
But it doesn’t sound like there’s much to celebrate about.

China is getting yet another kind of avian flu. (The Huffington Post)

The cinnamon challenge apparently isn’t safe anymore. (Chicago Tribune)

Reese Witherspoon was arrested. (USA Today)

So stay tuned for Columbia’s Earth Week events—you can learn how to help our planet and have something to celebrate about.

I like April 22nd because it’s 420 too via Shutterstock