11 Comments
In which anonymous Tipster reports mysterious Figure.
Last night, around midnight, I saw a mysterious figure putting up these posters around campus. When I asked her what they were all about, she said that she likes to “jump around the roofs of Hartley” and is looking for a sidekick to accompany her. When I asked her how she even got up there, she said “I have secret ways that I can’t tell you unless you end up becoming my sidekick.” Then we had the following dialogue:
Figure: It’s hard because, well, the problem is that your sidekick really has to be just a little bit less attractive than you are.
Tipster: Is that why you’re requiring pictures? To make sure they’re uglier than you?
Figure: Maybe.
Since then, every single poster that I saw has been taken down. It is possible that there are others that I have missed, but last night, I saw three different ones that are now gone. I don’t know if this implies an overwhelming interest, or a change of heart on the part of the post-er, or that the pre-existing Ninjas are upset by the prospect of competition and have sought to discourage it. Perhaps this is simply the business of the night.
Loading …
11 Comments
@superwoman I confess to taking down one of the posters on saturday night in a drunken stuper, with the intention of sending it to found magazine. i wish the dark figure luck in her search and assumed that she had put up enough other posters for my transgression not to make a difference.
@Anonymous If you’re dressed in ninja garb, does it really matter if you’re attractive?
@YES! because aside from Chris Farley, what morbidly obese person would you want to see in a tightly-fitting black outfit?
@DHI The thing is, a morbidly obese person would not be able to ninj well anyway, and, if they were, they would be a spectacle to behold – the wonder at seeing an enromously fat person walk silently, leap 10 feet into the air, and climb walls would easily overwhelm any unplesantness caused by their unnactractive figure.
@probably it was just people who wanted the posters.
@Anonymous in case you were looking for another flyer, it can be found on a poll on the 4th floor in lerner….
@suppose it was campus security, then, who took down the posters. more students leaping across roofs? no!
@the ninja's dilemma I don’t think the sidekick *necessarily* has to be less attractive than the main ninja. The whole point of the master – sidekick dynamic is a degree of sexual tension: witness batman and robin, or chip and dale.
@typo “buisness of the night”
@rp wait are you saying the correct spelling is buisness? because the post (at least right now) has business and that’s correct. buisness isn’t correct.
@observer i think #1 noted an error, bwog fixed it, the comment is now irrelevant