17 Comments
We like to think Columbia can scoff at such things as superfluous interinstitutional rivalries. Not only are there enough warring factions between 120th and 114th to feed our hunger for conflict for ages, but in truth, we’re too sophisticated and busy for that.
But we may be at a crucial junction in Columbia history. The sexually frustrated lurkers on Bored at Butler (the site is at this moment broken) have proposed a rivalry with Penn:
“click on newsworthy on your Official Vote so that it gets displayed on the side and doesn’t just disappear. And write a DP article on it. And click share to post it on your facebooks. And find a good offensive phrase. Cuck Folumbia kind of sounds dumb. And the Chinatown bus from Philly to NYC is really cheap, take it up here for the games and we’ll return the favor. Looking Forward to RIVALRY!”
Penn accepted on their B@B franchise Bored at VanPelt:
HEY COLUMBIA – ITS ON.
Pro: Maybe a fun football game once a year.
Con: We’d have to go to Philadelphia. Lame.
-Thanks to Layla for the tip
Another reason why a rivalry with Penn would be grossly unmatched, in the form of a “have some fries” Ivy League joke after the jump…
Harvard: “Did you do anything this weekend?”
“Nope. Have some fries.”
Yale: “I got mugged on the way to class today.”
“Have some fries.”
Brown: “I got a nose ring this weekend, Professor Smith.”
“Cool! Me too! Have some fries.”
Cornell: “I killed my lab partner this weekend.”
“Bummer. Have some fries.”
Princeton: “My father took away my porsche this weekend.”
“Poor dear. Have some escargot.”
Columbia: “I wish that I could be eating these fries at a better
school.”
“Me too. Let’s go get shot.”
Penn: “I wish that I could be eating these fries at a better school.”
“Me too. Let’s transfer to Columbia.”
Dartmouth: “Oh man, I got so trashed this weekend. It was f**kin awesome.”
“Have some beer.”
Loading …
17 Comments
@Dartmouth I’m pretty lost in this forest.
@dartmouth-columbia this rivalry makes more sense. equal US News rating. urban-rural split. conservative dartmouthians vs. fascist liberal anarchists. come on…
@It's okay, Cornell You can have Brown!
@Cornell HEY WHAT ABOUT ME?
@no way Posters 5 and 9 are right. Schools are always trying to “marry up” in a rivalry, which is why Penn boasts of its fierce rivalry with Princeton, yet Princeton is busy talking about their party when they beat Harvard and Yale.
It would make a lot of sense to have a rivalry with Princeton- NY/NJ, Hamilton/Burr, etc. But Princeton is never going to call us back. :-(
By these rules, not only would Penn be unwilling to trade its “rivalry” with Princeton (however one-sided it might be) for one with us, but we should not want to pair with them either because, US News aside, Columbia has a better rep than Penn. Penn is gross. We shouldn’t want to be seen with them.
@Alum True enough. NYU always thinks of Columbia as its rival — even in sports in which the two almost never compete against one another.
@i think princeton wants in on a rivalry with harvard. it feels left out. in my impression, columbia has a rivalry with princeton and so does penn. the penn columbia rivalry doesn’t work out so well, mostly because they almost always kick our ass.
@Dear Freshman Freshman who was
OR
Freshmen who were
I take pride in the grammatical proficiency of Bwog-commentators.
@seriously This kid is posting about the “columbia MYSPACE GROUP” on Bwog and thus probably needs to be cut a little slack as far as that whole “grammatical proficiency” thing is concerned.
@freshman ok, so for any freshman who were in the columbia MYSPACE GROUP, you know there already is a rivalry with Penn. those bitches were so annoying this summer.
@Actually Yeah I remember that, haha. I mean what kind of idiots use Comic Sans MS as their homepage font?
http://groups.myspace.com/upenn2010
BARF
@Anyone know What the Aaron Burr society is about? I’m not as Hamilton-crazy as some of the people here, but it still seems awefully odd for a group to celebrate the killer of one of our Framers.
@We can still hate PU The Princeton-Columbia rivalry is kind of mild, although it does have a fun historical background in Hamilton and Burr. I think everyone hates Princeton enough to have a partial rivalry with them.
Harvard and Yale have had a longstanding rivalry, but Harvard and Princeton fight for the #1 ranking, so it seems like Princeton really wants in on the Harvard-Yale rivalry, and doesn’t want to recognize any others. Penn had/has a rivalry with Princeton (they used to sell Puck Frinceton shirts on NotPennState.com, it has disappeared though). Penn complains that Princeton doesn’t really recognize them, so the moral of the story is that everyone hates Princeton.
@plus http://72.14.209.104/search?q=cache:-cl74EFGpwcJ:www.cumb.org/scripts.php%3Fscript%3D24530+Alexander+Hamilton+princeton&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=6&client=firefox-a
@also Let’s not forget that Princeton rejected Hamilton because he was a bastard child, which is why he went to King’s College (CU), and he later attacked the Princeton grounds during the revolutionary war.
@War w Princeton http://www.columbia.edu/cu/philo/content/archives/war.htm
@wait I am honestly really confused on this point – doesn’t Columbia have a longstanding, albeit kinda low-key, rivalry with Princeton, given their relationship with Alexander Hamilton, the football history, the political differences, etc.? I could’ve sworn I’d heard that more than once.