Columbia’s paranoiacs probably got chills when they received a flyer asking them if they live within 300 miles of campus and were willing to accommodate students in “the event of an emergency.” And if you’re not a paranoiac and are honestly  curious as to what kind of emergency could be catastrophic enough to both shut down campus and prevent people from traveling more than 300 miles, you should have a look at this

So does the University’s active preparation for a flu pandemic bad enough to keep us within a 300-mile quarantine for months at a time mean that we’re actually doomed, or that Columbia isn’t taking any chances? Until we find out, Bwog will sleep a little better knowing the University has a “pandemic influenza response plan” ready–although the whole thing strikes us as just a little…Strangelovian?