U.S. News and World Rash Report

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Tipster John Hill forwarded Bwog a most interesting link: Trojan is kind enough to release a ranked list (warning: PDF) of American universities on the basis of their standards of sexual health. Breathe easy; Columbia took 12th place of 139 (third among the Ivies, after Harvard and Penn, and 51 places above those filthy Cornell types). Notably, Brigham Young took the coveted 121 seat. Bottoms up!

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  1. ezra

    man, i love news that's from september, 2007.

    did the football team lose again?

  2. what do you  

    call a building where all residents practice safe sex?

    A condom-inium!

  3. John  

    Note that the BYU sexual health program is parietals, which is effective in an all Mormon context. This report has nothing to do with whether your classmates have the clap.

    • if you're  

      if you're happy and you know it clap your...

    • seriously  

      I know for a fact that Rutgers has the highest number of reported STDs in the undergraduate body in the state of New Jersey (my friend's brother works for the CDC and mercilessly teased him when he got into RU, telling him he might get a lesser education at Fairly Ridiculous (Farleigh Dickinson) but at least his **** wouldn't turn black and fall off). So I really have trouble believing they outrank us.

      Also, I had to Google parietals and ho-ly crap, is that shit messed up...

  4. ...  

    if you read the fine print, it appears that this is mostly based on online resources....

    that said, as atrocious as the columbia administration can be, one area where they really have their shit together is health services. columbia health services has a long tradition of being a leader ("go ask alice" was literally one of the very first sex/health q&a websites on the whole internet) and the rest of the administration could very much stand to learn about how to run a smooth operation from health services...

    i'm a huge critic of this fucking school. but i have to hand it to the health people, they really have their shit together.

  5. argh  

    i hate all nighters. please help me survive the end of the semester by being extra witty and awesome until finals are over.
    with love,
    a loving reader.

  6. just thinking about

    anton glamb and remembered this video. so cool.

  7. but  

    think about it, the only reason why we rated so high on the list is because barnard hands out condoms and pregnancy tests like they're candy on halloween

  8. confused

    This report doesn't make much sense at all. I think the ranking seems inverted, in fact. Perhaps Trojan is just rewarding brand loyalty.

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