Nov

23

ResLife: Accidental Missionaries, or Introducing: Scripture Candy-Gate

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We were dismayed to receive the following Concerned Email from Nussbaum resident Allon Brann this afternoon.

Brann, like so many unsuspecting students, attended the Nussbaum incarnation of ResLife’s Thanksgiving free-food giveaway. But “the holiday offering of cider, pie, whipped cream, and candy is merely a front for a sinister aim:  the indoctrination and eventual conversion of the non-believers among us,” he said.

You see, the candy corn distributed by ResLife is not candy corn at all! Nay, it’s Scripture Candy (“Reaching the World on Piece at a Time!”), and every package includes a Biblical quotation. (See above for two examples from Corinthians and Romans.) Brann’s package featured the following: “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” It’s Romans 5.8, and Allon Brann is not pleased.

Also of note: the Scripture Candy Company labels the candy corn “Harvest Seeds,” when they are abosutely not.

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20 Comments

  1. The Krommdor...  

    Needs to be axed...

    Love,
    former RA

  2. Obadiah

    Fear ye the wrath of Kristin Krumm!

  3. lulz  

    so is this a "bias act"?

  4. Wow  

    Reslife is so cheap that they were using candy that was being given out by proselytizers?

  5. #4, Still  

    They also sell Cross Pops and Jelly Bean Prayer Bottles.

  6. ehh  

    candy corn sucks, whatever its name may be.

  7. In the know  

    This has absolutely nothing to do with Kromm.

  8. lol!  

    I ignored the candy corn 'cause candy corn sucks, but shame on res life.

    On another note, the lollipop-pouches were fantastic! i have happily displayed my felt-turkey-lollipop pouch on the door to my room!

  9. I know...  

    The lollipop pouches were awesome as well as the thank you card idea.

  10. noone  

    would've complained if they were handing out snickers

  11. YO BWOG  

    How about a report on NOOG.com? I became a member recently and would love it if more Columbians/Barnardians joined!

    (I had nothing to do in the creation of the site, so I'm not promoting it like that!)

  12. yeah  

    reslife also apparently performs exorcisms too.

  13. ugh  

    God forbid we distribute things that don't encourage us to treat other humans like disposable pieces of flesh.

    • Yes, yes  

      Candy corn is absolutely part of the vast secular "free love" conspiracy. Don't all of you candy corn eaters know that you're just degrading your body with your candy corn hookup culture?

  14. Sprinkles

    So...why did ResLife distribute candy corn with Christian messages on the packaging? Anyone know?

  15. yes  

    I witness an exorcisms on my floor (Broadway) performed by one of the RAs.

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