Bwog knows that you are “writing” your 25 page papers and “studying” for your heap of exams, so we came up with a little procrastination contest (and you don’t even have to open any extra Firefox tabs). Just search your professors on Facebook (yes, we know you have it open) and post your favorites on the thread, with reasons defending your choices. Bwog has a few examples.
French Lecturer Vincent Aurora has activities such as “Gesticulating bombastically over a few too many drinks” and status messages like “Vincent has survived 13 consecutive days alone with his children–an unparalleled feat–with no fatalities.”
Logician Achille Varzi, because his profile picture is inexplicably upside-down and he is in a group called ‘metaphysicists’ not ‘metaphysicians’.
Computer Scientist Paul Blaer‘s profile has pictures of him holding a machine gun, and he even has his own (well-deserved) fan club group.
Historian Samuel Moyn, because for Education Info, under description, he wrote: “I teach college.” He’s also in the greatest Facebook group of all time.
Jeffrey Sachs, because his “About Me” is written in the third person.
English Professor Brent Edwards, because his current status is “Brent Edwards is trying to decide whether to write recommendation letters or pay bills.”
Russian Professor Rebecca Stanton, because she’s a fan of Sarah Dooley and so are we.
CC Chair Roosevelt Montas, because he has two nearly identical profile pictures: as Bwog likes to call them, Office Hours by Day and Office Hours by Night.
English Professor Julie Crawford, because it’s not clear whether she’s wearing a shirt in her profile picture.
UPDATE 5:23 PM: Professors Montas and Stanton have noticed!
@obvi nicholas dames, who responds to friend requests with shocking speed.
@UMMM UMMM everyone is forgetting about the hottest of hot anthro teachers, severin fowles, whose facebook includes pictures of him dressed up in a black (possibly with chaps? hopefully assless) cowboy outfit. its pretty much the best thing i’ve ever seen. he also has his very own facebook fanclub — “severely enamored with sev”
@ummm All chaps are assless.
The more you know…
@definitely sev is the man
@vincent aurora is the best french teacher EVER
@writing upside-down isn’t all too hard once you figure it out…
@hey it’s professor montas not professor roosevelt.
@varzi how did he write his current status upside down?
@3 comments 1) Sam Moyn is amazing. He should win because he lists his screen name in facebook. Wanna chat with Sam Moyn?
2) Achille Varzi implored our logic class not to ask him questions about exams via facebook.
3) What about Melissa Schwartzberg? She’s in a group against banning photos of breast feeding and she describes her politics and religious beliefs as “culturally stereotypical”
@alum How could you forget Sha-bee-yay? (xavier sala-i-martin). It’s all about the music
@dmitry zakharov Ok, he’s not a professor yet, but he’s in a group called “People who promise to name their first child “Ceaseless Aggression.”” Plus he was voted by his friends as the person who can drink the most and this http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=679113168#/photo.php?pid=31440706&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=117482&id=100099.
@BME Prof Andreas Hielscher. This guy is such a hardass, and his profile is just a little…awkward. He has an album called “Me Myself I” that are just headshots of him. He has a note that says simply “Well – where shall I start …” ??
Additionally, he has the “Hug Me” application ..
@emw Brent Edwards is such a dreamboat.
@LOVE Oh man vincent aurora. He’s threatened to make his facebook private at least 10 times, because his students keep ridiculing him about it. it’s cool, though, because he’s that ridiculous in real life, too.
@best man ever...
@me. Moyn for provost
@kjr A big second for NCB!
@well I think Julie Crawford wins by default.
@I'd also like to add that every one of Rebecca Stanton’s statuses are about how much she hates teaching.
@what? they are not!
@Perhaps... not all. But there are certainly a lot of them, provided that one counts complaints about paper grading and lecturing. She’s still an awesome person.
@Hands down, Nicholas Christie-Blick.
His about me begins: “Rock star. Sedentary geologist. Long-time member of the Columbia faculty. And very likely the least-cool facebook entry in the history of digital bonding.”
His profie also includes a note called “Hockey Mama for Obama” and self-deprecating comments on almost all photos he is tagged in about how his class doesn’t pay attention to him.
@hahah ncb wins for sure
@true dat I love NCB, and yes his facebook is awesome … you frosh/sophs going to death valley with him this year are lucky as hell to spend a week with this God among men – and that’s coming from someone who now knows he hates geology
… great fuckin trip
@FoS Professor Stuart Gill because in two of his three pictures he’s brandishing some kind of sharp object with a menacing look, while in the other picture he’s looking lovingly at another man.
@Diatonic Professor Marlon Feld.
In his pictures, he’s in an album entitled “Cosby Sweater Party,” and takes the cake for wearing the ugliest sweater there.
@varzi's fbook groups haha.
The Bertrand Russell group for people who aren’t a member of a group
Royal Society for Putting Things on top of Other Things
@SAL Anthropology Professor Paige West for the following reasons:
-Her photo is adorable
-Her political views say: “Hope (for the first time since 1991)”
-She often uses the application “Shite Gifts for Academics” (the list of gifts is too numerous to list)
-Her favorite quotations includes an excellent one from Say Anything, which relates to her field of study, that is, consumption theory