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Real estate is a steal: PrezBo’s henchmen nabbed two new buildings this past week.  One can reasonably assume that the Manhattanville location will be absorbed into our financially-delayed behemoth.  But the 113th Street purchase?  It’d make a killer residence hall.

Impossible decisions are everywhere: Change we need, but probably not that we can believe in.  Poor Barack wishes the Guantanamo detainees would just vanish like as Flex has.

Stiglitz is, like, famous: And the economy is in such bad shape that he’s reduced to name-dropping dead guys.  Like this guy he knew at Yale, who didn’t agree with him.  But that was then.

Celebrities also make mistakes: Hermione may not be gracing us with her presence in the fall, despite our hopes to see someone other than Franco that other crime-ridden city wants her.

Correlation is causation: Marked by the disappearance of a certain feathered friend, the severity of heart attacks has been on the decline (for people who don’t have midterms).

Your money is gone: PrezBo won’t be winning his money back any time soon, since in the effort to reduce meaningless securities lawsuits, they made it harder to file meaningful ones.  A Columbia law professor has a possible workaround, but MrsBo will still be mad.