To exams: Who were you fooling with all of those hours you spent in Butler last week? Not the good people at Cramster.com, apparently — the cheatsheet site reports more traffic from Columbia than any other school. So this is how you were using those WiFi maps.
To fat kids: The closer the fast food, the fatter the students. Considering the nearest McDonald’s is about five blocks from campus, Columbia might be in the clear, but just think what obesity rates must be like at Hamburger University.
To costly journalism: Attention, bankrupt media outlets! The J-School wants your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning for a paycheck. Provided they submit three clips and a cover letter, of course.