The Nexus’s New Name Will Hunt You Down
Written by Bwog Staff
At the “coolest” part of Barnard’s Spirit Day – “Celebrity Scoops,” where administrators served free ice cream to students – President Deborah Spar announced that the Nexus will now be known as “The Diana” (yes, just “The Diana”).
The new moniker replaces the unofficial name of “The Vagelos Center,” a change that
possibly maybe perhaps almost certainly came about because of the building instantly being nicknamed “The Vag.” Not only is it the first name of Diana Vagelos, whose family gave $15 million to the project, but, as President Spar noted in her announcement, “Diana is the goddess of female power and strength.” Spar did not note that Diana is also a virgin, the goddess of the hunt and chastity, and notable for her enjoyment of revenge, often taken on men.
A quick informal naming survey suggested that students in attendance approved of the name. Then again, several attendees also commented that, with that much money, the Vagelos family “can name it whatever they want.”