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The Nexus’s New Name Will Hunt You Down

At the “coolest” part of Barnard’s Spirit Day – “Celebrity Scoops,” where administrators served free ice cream to students – President Deborah Spar announced that the Nexus will now be known as “The Diana” (yes, just “The Diana”).

The new moniker replaces the unofficial name of “The Vagelos Center,” a change that possibly maybe perhaps almost certainly came about because of the building instantly being nicknamed “The Vag.” Not only is it the first name of Diana Vagelos, whose family gave $15 million to the project, but, as President Spar noted in her announcement, “Diana is the goddess of female power and strength.” Spar did not note that Diana is also a virgin, the goddess of the hunt and chastity, and notable for her enjoyment of revenge, often taken on men.

A quick informal naming survey suggested that students in attendance approved of the name. Then again, several attendees also commented that, with that much money, the Vagelos family “can name it whatever they want.”

– JCD

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32 Comments

  • has anyone noticed says:

    @has anyone noticed that “The Diana” is really hard to say three times fast? What an awkward name… I vote for Diana’s Vag

  • fuck this, lets be honest says:

    @fuck this, lets be honest women are things.

  • How about says:

    @How about “The Di”? Looking four years out, that seems like the most likely name for the building.

  • what? says:

    @what? no Indiana jokes?

  • it's been said before says:

    @it's been said before but will Barnard be painting the walls of Diana red once each month?

  • this is dumb says:

    @this is dumb I almost can’t believe that this family is so desperate to name it after this person that they will go to the lengths of calling it ‘the Diana.” What an idiotic name for a building! I’m glad people will keep calling it the Vag, though I do not object to people saying things like “come inside Diana” and whatnot.

    Also, this is great: “Spar did not note that Diana is also a virgin, the goddess of the hunt and chastity, and notable for her enjoyment of revenge, often taken on men.” True??

    1. i agree, but says:

      @i agree, but it’s not that far-fetched. she did donate 15 million. of course she’d want her name involved.

  • The Artemis says:

    @The Artemis would have been a much better choice.

  • How about says:

    @How about Diana’s Vag?

  • Hello... says:

    @Hello... “hey, what’s up?”

    “Hey! I’m inside Diana, and I’m, er… reading a newspaper?”

    1. Indeed says:

      @Indeed Calling it “The Diana” is no better. Will it be easy to get inside Diana? Will Columbia men be inside Diana for hours, or mere minutes? Etc.

  • for dance class, says:

    @for dance class, I can’t wait to enter Diana and get all hot and sweaty.

  • ... says:

    @... The Vagiana

  • trivia says:

    @trivia so how many guys can the Vag take at once?

    1. The Vag says:

      @The Vag Is Swipe-Access only for protection.

  • AJ PASCUA says:

    @AJ PASCUA What about AJ Pascua???

    1. Not AJ says:

      @Not AJ you guys are pathetic – honestly your behavior has been absolutely disgraceful on bwog and I’m ashamed to go to school with asshats like you guys – grow the fuck up. alright
      [/diatribe]

      … and now back to something that we can all enjoy – making vagina jokes about barnard:

      I’ll be damned if this “Diana” is gonna pun-block (fyi this is worse than a cock-block) the entire Columbia campus. To defeat the evil ways of this prude you gotta go with the same strategy as at 1020: setup “the diana” with hot, glassy, wheelchair-accessible “the alfred” across the street… then come in the Vag.

      VAG FOREVER!

  • cc '10 says:

    @cc '10 errr

    * sticking with calling it the vag

    my b

  • cc '10 says:

    @cc '10 yep sticking to calling it the vag

  • NOT THE DIANA says:

    @NOT THE DIANA Just call it the Vagina center. Let’s not be coy here by calling it the Vag. Vagina Center. Not Diana. Not Vag. Just straight up Vagina.

    1. well says:

      @well why stop there?
      The Cunt? The Pussy? The Lovebox? The Fish Taco?

  • hahaha says:

    @hahaha Diana, the goddess of chastity, representing Barnard women. mwahahahaha I love DSpar. She has such a diabolical cunning sense of humor.

    1. What a says:

      @What a Cunning Linguist.

  • alright says:

    @alright after class at the “Alexander” I’m going to the “Joseph Murray” to get a book for my research paper and then I’m probably going to “Ferris” for dinner, which is located in the “Alfred” Some buildings have first names, others don’t for a reason.

    1. good try says:

      @good try alright is wrong, use all right, don’t contribute to that crap
      also Ferris is a pretty common name for Ferris Booth Commons…that doesn’t really work well

    2. you mean says:

      @you mean “Nicholas Murray”

  • no, Diana says:

    @no, Diana Still calling it the Vag.

  • yes says:

    @yes the Diana lol. What a cop-out. That’s like calling Lerner the Alfred.

    1. Not Alfred, says:

      @Not Alfred, Just “The Alf.”

  • clg says:

    @clg yeah, something tells me that the only people that will call it “the diana” are the humorless and self-righteous among us.

  • Yep says:

    @Yep “We’re Still Calling It The Vag”

  • So.... says:

    @So.... we can just call it the Vag?

    k sweet thanks

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