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Yes, People Actually Read Those


Procrastinating instead of reading Politics, Bwog was scrolling aimlessly through the sidebar of its iTunes library when “FREE WEEZY” caught its eye. Thus a quest began, and Bwog has spent the last weeks feverishly scrolling through iTunes and checking available Wi-Fi networks for the cleverest and most outlandish. If you think we missed a good one, leave it in the comments.

iTunes Libraries

  • Aaron Phillips‘ Library
  • Bob Loblaw’s Law Blog
  • BORA has nice music
  • c.v.s.
  • foomp.
  • music FOR ME
  • Newfun
  • NO! I don’t want butter on my toast
  • Oh, yes…you may butter my toast allllll you want
  • planetary systems
  • Poopie
  • Shallow Mailbox
  • Tyra’s Hot Shiz
  • Virus!! Don’t Click!

Wi-Fi Networks

  • Aurelia Aurita
  • clown
  • Dragon’s Breath
  • ExoticBallhairCompetition
  • golagy
  • GoldCheetah
  • Heathbar Net
  • South Africa
  • lock and load
  • NOURtorious G
  • Ocampo
  • snorlax
  • stegosaurus
  • The Kremlin
  • White Castle

Image from Wikimedia Commons

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  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous ezra koenig’s library

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous EC wifi: Donatella Moss
    (West wing schwat??)

  • hmmm.... says:

    @hmmm.... and so the tradition of having whacky Itunes and WIFI names begins

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous iTunes: George Bush’s cocaine

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Wifi network: Arioso Hates Cheese

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous EC iTunes: asstitties
    EC Wifi: Maiden China

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous KentuckyFriedPimps

    1. Hartley 2A says:

      @Hartley 2A Are you an old Hartley 2Aer. friend?

    2. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous He means Wallach 2Cer (And possibly now a Wien 4er)

      1. Wallach 2C says:

        @Wallach 2C In the house!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Wifi: Team Edward.

    (wish I was kidding)

  • Janelle says:

    @Janelle 600 W116th st Wifi: Shrimps gone wild

  • Janelle says:

    @Janelle 600 W116th Wifi: Shrimps gone wild

  • FREE WEEZY says:

    @FREE WEEZY Yeah, I’m free weezy. It’s been that way since last year. My roommates WIFI network is “DatNewNew”

  • Hooah says:

    @Hooah Bwog, I like this a lot. This is you at your best.

  • WiFi says:

    @WiFi FearMySpiceRack

  • CC '11 says:

    @CC '11 iTunes from JJ freshman year (the only year I really fully appreciated access to everyone else’s music):

    Good Shit Lollipop

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous wifi from Carman last year

    1. Person says:

      @Person This was one of the greats. Also, after a few minutes of trial and error I discovered the password was 12345678.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Hogan Wifi: SnapeNode

  • Yes they are says:

    @Yes they are JJ wifi: “Hippopotamuses are cruel.”

    1. The Hippo says:

      @The Hippo That’s mine! Wooo.

  • shiii- says:

    @shiii- And JJ itunes: fahhhhhhhhk.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous there’s a WiFi network you can pick up on the lawns called “The Iliad is like Gangster Rap”

  • dear bwog says:

    @dear bwog according to Strunk, all possessive singulars of nouns are formed by adding (‘s), whatever the final consonant. correction: Aaron Phillips’s Library. The only exception to this is when using ancient names that end in -us, -es, or -is. (e.g. “Charles’s computer” but “Achilles’ heel.”)

    1. correction says:

      @correction Bwog did not create this WiFi name, thus Bwog is not responsible for its grammatical errors. Bwog is merely reporting the name, comma catastrophes and all.

    2. Actually, says:

      @Actually, in that case, you would say “the heel of Achilles.”

      Source: “Elements of Style”

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous WIFI around 112th street: Home Sweet Home

    so cute!

  • anonymous says:

    @anonymous mj ain’t dead

  • Dear People, says:

    @Dear People, I actually prefer to have butter all over me

    Yours truly,

    1. uh says:

      @uh Well, I prefer to spread my goodness all over something with a hole in it, like a bagel.


      1. Unfortunately . . . says:

        @Unfortunately . . . for butter, anything toasted is crusty.

  • CC14 says:

    @CC14 John Jay wi-fi: Ahnkmorpork

  • JJ iTunes says:

    @JJ iTunes “Holdin McGroin”
    “Prince of Spades”

    That’s with six – count ’em – six h’s.

  • Over on Riverside... says:

    @Over on Riverside... There’s a wi-fi called “IAMTHEINTERNETS”

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous The Champagne Room…

    1. Person says:

      @Person Oh Psi Upsilon, you lovable scamps!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous sometimes i get this wifi account called “Columbia University”

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Harmony WiFi: FERGALICIOUS, Tar Pit Heaven

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Schapiro is boring. Step it up, fuckers.

    1. schapiro itunes says:

      @schapiro itunes there’s one called “My Social Security # Is…”

  • Old Fart says:

    @Old Fart I remember when iTunes library names were a proto-social network. People would list their room number and or screen name (assuming you were plugged into your room ethernet, you were usually only seeing computers also in the same dorm). Make friends with music!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous In the frontiers lecture… one of the WiFi’s was “frontiers sucks” hahahhaa

  • schap wifi says:

    @schap wifi Compton

  • in 620 116th says:

    @in 620 116th ‘goosepiles’ and ‘nopants’

  • hey what happened to says:

    @hey what happened to ninjapimps, you used to be able to see it in butler 202.

    oh the good ol days

  • RMS says:

    @RMS $ host has address

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous what is this server?

      1. RMS says:

        @RMS Probably a CUIT employee’s desktop that is no longer in use.

      2. RMS says:

        @RMS No, actually that subnet ( looks like a DHCP testbed of some sort. is in there along with a 155 dynamic addresses.

  • supersenior says:

    @supersenior when i was a freshman i had my itunes library listed as “suck my balzac”

  • EC says:

    @EC wifi in ec:
    hamilton’s ghost

    tobias funke

  • poop says:

    @poop electril feel!

  • Wien says:

    @Wien KentuckyFriedPimps

  • anon says:

    @anon OneRouterToRuleThemAll

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