Dec

8

Magazine Preview: Campus Gossip

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The November issue of The Blue and White will be here soon. Read selections from the magazine on Bwog.

Say Cheese
An adult, leading a group of what looks like young high school students onto Revson Plaza, points at statue of Bellerophon Taming Pegasus:
“That’s modern art…”
Points at the statue of the Tightrope Walker
“Look, this is modern art too! You can take a picture if you want.”

Nuked
“I can’t believe it. She decided to put the ENTIRE pumpkin in the microwave.”

A father to his child in Oren’s:
“If only every meal were cookies—but it can’t be, ’cause you’ll get sick and your skin will fall off.”

Pardons et Petit Dejeuner
Saturday morning on the patio outside John Jay, a French frosh approaches an American gal: “I have been reminded of what I did last night, and I apologize.”

Beta Pledge Class 2019
Small child on Broadway, pointing to liquor store:
“Mama, let’s go there!”

Wanted: GPS
Guy on phone: “Hey, I’m right in the middle of campus, why don’t you meet me at that round thing, whatever it’s called.”

Philosopher MILFs
CC student 1: “Your mom is the ideal form of prostitution.”
CC student 2: “Well, if there were an ideal form of slut, it would be your mom!”
CC student 1: “Your mom thinks she lives in the ideal citystate because she is shared by all the men…”

Older brother’s advice to his freshman sis, delivered over a cup at Hungarian:
“Enjoy yourself, and you will probably be diagnosed with mono before you graduate.”
The latter may in fact be caused by the former…

The Times of Their Lives
One drunk freshman to another: “Dude, this is fucking awesome. I’m not even gonna BRUSH my TEETH tonight.”

Professor Herbert Sloan, during his “U.S. History to Civil War” lecture:
Prof. Sloan: “Does anyone know the year your state was born?”
Uncomfortable silence.
“Come on, guys… isn’t this something you learn in elementary school? In third grade?”
Uncomfortable silence. Then, dismayed, and with gravity…
“This is depressing. The people who are worried that America’s going to Hell in a hand basket would be only too convinced by this demonstration.”
…1776 is not the right answer?

Schist…It happens!

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10 Comments

  1. Anonymous  

    The French frosh to the American gal one is bs, the exact same thing was posted on bwog that happened in John Jay with a "distinctly continental chap." I bet a good deal of the rest of these are stolen too.

  2. Texas, our Texas.  

    1845, bitches!

  3. The french frosh  

    was actually english, trust me i know

  4. Bellerophon  

    So THAT'S what that weird statue is. Thank you Bwog!

  5. this  

    is very funny. more is needed.

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