Babyoncé Is Being Born at St. Lukes— The Other One
Written by Bwog Staff
In case you haven’t noticed, Bwog unabashedly adores Beyoncé, so we were zomg-falling-on-the-floor when we learned that the real Destiny’s Child will be born at none other than St. Luke’s across Amsterdam. Slate reports Beyoncé and Jay-Z rented out their swanky Labor and Delivery Suite for the Bay-B’s delivery. The Birthing Center is complete with hardwood floors and a “spa-sized jacuzzi,” which is funny because we have, like, the least glamorous associations with St. Lukes since that CAVA episode that one time.
But then we realized it’s all happening at St. Luke’s-Roosevelt by Columbus Circle, not Columbia. Womp. Prezbo’s twitter had even gotten its hopes up. Whatever, we’re still excited.
In honor of this momentous occasion, Bwog plans to listen to all of Jay-Z and Queen Bey’s collaborations and dream up other fake names for their superhuman child (Bey-Z, Jayonce, Jay-Zus…). Below, we take you back to that stunning VMA performance when Sasha Fierce announced to the crowd “I want you to feel the love that’s growing inside me” before unfastening the buttons of her sequined blazer and rubbing her baby bump. We’re counting down!
Tags: Beyoncé, great expectations, jay-z, misleading headlines, perezbwog, power couple, things that you thought were happening close by but aren't and now make you feel disproportionately disappointed