For your Sunday night viewing pleasure, enjoy this politically correctly titled video starring our very own Ferris made by some of our own esteemed colleagues! It’s good.

Lyrics

[JAMES BENNETT II]
So I ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me, but first dining gotta fine me,
What’s 50 meals on a meal plan like D, could you please remind me?
(ball so hard) this fish crazy, pasta bar cuz yo ass lazy
I could do East or 212, TG in Jay for that sweet gravy.
(ball so hard) That lo mein, Cottage man, shit’s insane,
(ball so hard) with disdain, swipin’ in to my domain.
Pizza, pasta, frittata — shit whipped up quick!
John Jay, Hewitt, Ferris, after 6.
Ball so hard) Got bubble tea, Double Shots and mo’ coffee,
Sushi, truly, OJ for that OG.
(ball so hard) That soup too, sickenin chicken noodoo,
if you ate what I’ve ate, you be in Ferris getting fucked up too!
(ball so hard) Get pasta, get in line and then move fasta,
half pesto, half ‘fredo, preachin the sauce like a church pastor.
(ball so hard) For them crepes, steal some apples some green grapes,
eat shit, all day, time for class? i been late.

Ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.
So I ball so hard even wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John Jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.

[RYAN MANDELBAUM]
She said “Ry, can we get Ferris after eight?”,
I said “Girl, you know I’d rather hit the Jay,
I’ll swipe you in, you don’t need no tray
and if you want I’ll let you lick one off my plate…”
(So I ball so hard) that’s John Jay… ain’t gon’ pay,
(ball so hard) what’s for dinner? Fish fillet?
(ball so hard) Your soup so cold! Microwave,
(ball so hard) act like you never be around dining halls like this again.
dining dolls is what I spend, fuck that I ain’t on no plan,
Choose my sauce when I’m in Ferrs… I’m just sayin’
Mo Williams ain’t do it right, if you ask me,
And we know that all of the shawties eat at Hewee,
What’s chicken, that’s tikka? Which line’s movin quicka?
What’s cheap that’s the liquor, what’s that spice, it’s paprika!
JJ smoothies the chillest, Feel Good cheese is the grillest,
got my BWAAAAHHHH in Ferris, and they going to grill us, huh?

Ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John Jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.
So I ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John Jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.

[SHUDIPTO RAHMAN]
We ain’t be reppin’ the hood, but we be reppin that hooda,
falafel cart for the start then hit up Westside for gouda.
Duane Reade’s, lately, that neighborhood spot for iced tea,
Arnold, Palmer, half and half but all G.
(ball so hard) That’s John Jay, not Broadway,
(ball so hard) where’s it at? Across the way,
(ball so hard) on Amsterdam, and one-fourteen,
(ball so hard) gotta get there quick if you ever wanna get Thanksgiving dinnn.
(ball so hard) in that Jay, stormin’ Ferris, that shit cray.
With my boys from eleven on the side of me, if they got tater tots you better make way,
(ball so hard) at JJ’s, get me some wings and some pancakes,
Charlie’s crew always keepin’ it fresh with that grill hot and them cold shakes.
It’s okay, ain’t it Jay? Down here at Columbi-ay,
as long as I got Ferris cookin’ up all you can eat buffet.
Buffalo wrap, Caesar salad, thin crust pizza, chopped carrots,
if you catch me puttin’ eyes on you, I just need that salt could you please pass it?

Ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John Jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.
Ball so hard even Wilma wanna fry me,
that’s John Jay, that’s John Jay… that’s John Jay.

Credits

Directed and produced by:
Jasper L. Clyatt

Starring:
James Bennett II
Shudipto Rahman
Ryan Mandelbaum

Written by:
James Bennett II
Shudipto Rahman
Ryan Mandelbaum
Jasper L. Clyatt

Cinematography and camera operation by:
Max Bartick
Raeye Daniel
Jasper L. Clyatt

Sound Engineering by:
Melaku Assegued

Edited by:
Jasper L. Clyatt