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Lumosity Says Columbians are the 61st Smartest Students

Lumosity thinks we’re dunces.

Lumosity analyzed various colleges and universities in a study designed to test “the cognitive performance of their students.” Its study used the voluntary game scores of 89,699 college users to create a “Grand Index score,” which Lumosity then ranked by institution. Topping the list were MIT, Harvard, and Stanford, while Columbia interestingly came in at 61st and second to last among Ivies. Brown ranks at 31, Princeton at 39, Cornell at 62, NYU at 91, and Bob Jones University at 102. Here’s the top 10 of Lumosity’s Smartest Colleges:

  1. Massachusetts Institute of Technology
  2. Harvard University
  3. Stanford University
  4. Northwestern University
  5. Yale University
  6. Washington University in St Louis
  7. Dartmouth College
  8. Wellesley College
  9. Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology
  10. Duke University

Cone of shame via Shutterstock

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36 Comments

  • Nate Silver called says:

    @Nate Silver called He wanted to know who the hell didn’t figure out you need representative samples?

    1. STATS! says:

      @STATS! BOOM. Lay it down. Let’s see the raw data, and no, fuckers, I don’t mean nudes. Okay, I do, but I want to see the numbers first.

  • MD says:

    @MD not surprised cuz we’re letting in all this scrubs majoring in shit like Biology and Sociology or whatever other easy-A non-finance courses they can find. Columbia students are pretty dumb in my experience.

    1. ah yes, says:

      @ah yes, biology, known for its especially stupid students who go on to do mind numbingly dumb professions like being a doctor

      1. MD says:

        @MD yo man have fun being a doctor with Obamacare, no more money for you hahahaha.

        Peace out, my Ferrari is waiting. Just bought it with the money I made from my finance degree.

        1. JR says:

          @JR What a pathetic troll

  • Van Owen says:

    @Van Owen Tests are gay.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous ugh I wish I could force you to chug my jizz until your stomach needs to be pumped. Although I at first doubted that a dumber post could exist, every post you contribute seems to prove me wrong. Please, before you embarrass yourself any further with your pathetically witless comments, just go away.

      1. Van Owen says:

        @Van Owen If you’re looking for a stomach full of jizz just call home and talk to your daddy! If you call him before 1am you’ll catch him before he starts his shift over at Blazing Saddle’s glory hole.

        1. Van Owen says:

          @Van Owen P.S., your mother’s a whore…and you’re brother is only half-retarded.

          1. Anonymous says:

            @Anonymous u spealt your rong

  • Heisenberg says:

    @Heisenberg This study seems definitive, I guess I’ll transfer to Dartmouth.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgvwfvTcNl0&feature=fvwrel

  • anon says:

    @anon i’m surprised people haven’t started blaming barnard and GS for the low scores yet.

    1. Van Owen says:

      @Van Owen Barnard doesn’t even go here, so why should they count?

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous just skimmed the methods section. they chose students aged 17-25 with the university email address or ip address associated with the university’s web domain sooooo really it could be anyone

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous ~! I m Da PrOoFF w R DUMM!

  • The Honourably Based FILGB says:

    @The Honourably Based FILGB Why would I trust a publication named after a Harry Potter spell?

    1. GS '56 says:

      @GS '56 Because you’re too busy sipping tea to notice?

  • CC'12 says:

    @CC'12 I’m guessing the Columbia sample was primarily freshmen and residents of potluck house…

  • Right so... says:

    @Right so... …the “random sample” was still a volunteer sample: a sampling of uni-holding students, aged 17-25, who somehow had the time and interest in this. What was the total number of students culled from Columbia? To reiterate the first post, how is this a representative sample?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous clearly if the University of Wisconsin-Madison is above us, this must be a pretty definitive study…

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous It’s kind of a neat little informal study. From what I gather from a quick skim over the pdf, it’s just a fair amount of back-patting that the scores on their “cognitive game” moderately correlates with other metrics, like college reported SAT scores and ACT scores ranges as well as USNews rankings. I really don’t think Lumiosity meant this to be taken too seriously as they do mention many limitations to their methodology.

    So don’t worry, guys. We may still all be smart (I’d hope). Certainly the writers at Bwog are smart enough to know that an informal and irrelevant ranking from an obscure company combined with a strong title would drive page views and pointless bickering in the comments.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Yale and Columbia are tied for the highest comination of SAT scores, GPA, class rank, according to USNews.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Although it is hard to believe, I believe there is a thread of truth in this study.

    Before coming to Columbia from a foreign country, I believed that some of the smartest and most rigorous students attend here given the hype about the low admission rate, high SAT scores, etc… Heck, the summer before my freshman year, I read the entire collection of Lit Hum works in anticipation of a grueling class filled with super motivated and superiorly intelligent students, a class I may not be able to keep up with.

    Upon arrival, I had a rude awakening. At times I found it difficult if not impossible to justify the effort I put in to get into this school. Why am I here to witness students struggle over back of the envelope calculations and unit conversions in Frontiers. Why am I thousands of miles away from my family to listen to the jokester make another bullshit attempt at making some kind of noise in Lit Hum? Yes we know Oedipus is a tragic figure and Achilles has a tragic flaw.

    I am here at Columbia to be a part of the most intellectually rigorous and curious community in the world. That is what I am willing to pay $60k a year for. That is why I see my family only once a year. That is why I live in a 96sq feet single in Wien…

    I’ve dedicated years of my life to getting into Columbia. My family has dedicated the majority of their wealth in sending me here. So it’s very hard for me to admit to myself the truth. It took me a long time to muster enough courage to say this but I wish I went to another college.

    1. Choppa says:

      @Choppa Someone give this man a medal

    2. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Welcome to America. This is the best of the best. At the other colleges they are not even reading any books you have heard of and just partying, drinking, and hazing.

    3. Dear Freshman, says:

      @Dear Freshman, Classes like lit hum and frontiers of science are not of strong importance to anyone really which is why you may feel this way once you step into those classes. However, once you take higher level courses that are intended for majors (like in my case bio, orgo etc) you find yourself in a room of very smart students who don’t take these rigorous courses as jokes. Brace yourself.

    4. ... says:

      @... Too easy for you? Transfer to SEAS.

  • me too. says:

    @me too. I completely agree with you, but for different reasons. I detest the loneliness of this university, the stress placed upon people in the sciences, engineers and pre-meds. The caustic behavior of Columbia students who could not be bothered to say hello to you, ask how you are or even really care about you/anything because they are all too busy. The first year, I saw sparks of curiosity in my fellow Columbians, but by now it has disintegrated into grade-grubbing or joking in an attempt to sound “cool”. I believe that if I took the money i spent on this university and spent it anywhere else I would probably be happier and have a better undergraduate experience. But, I can’t just transfer, after all, I made a commitment to my parents, transferring is actually hard and I’ll see this through. I legitimately cannot wait to graduate though. I am counting down the days.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous You voiced out all my feelings… You are not alone. I hate it at Columbia. Cant wait to graduate.

    2. somedude says:

      @somedude it will be worth the degree in the longrun to put up with the bullshit in the short term

  • CC'14 says:

    @CC'14 At least GS students are real Columbia students and have high GPAs.
    Why is Barnard even being discussed here?

    Also, this bullshit ranking lists Ithaca College, Calvin College, the University of the Pacific, and Boston University ahead of Columbia, so this list should be completely ignored.

  • CC'14 says:

    @CC'14 By the way, Bwog — Cornell University was ranked 52nd, while Cornell COLLEGE (Iowa) was ranked 62nd, which makes Columbia last in the Ivy League. Please correct.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Make some friends and be social. Smile. You sound like a depressing, boring person. Your bad personality would be transferred to any college you would have went to. Its not the college, its you.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous they see me trolling…

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous The “test” was given to anyone at the institution aged 19-26. It did not necessarily have to be enrolled students. It could be anyone.

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