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AskBwog: LOOK! FRESHMAN IS EVOLVING!

A wild FRESHMAN appears! What will BWOG do? BWOG used CONVENIENT FEATURE WHERE WE ANSWER QUESTIONS. It’s super effective!

Hi Mr. Bwog,

My name is Chris. I am a freshman. I have a question. What happens to me after Saturday? Am I a sophomore? Or do I have to wait until June?

All week this question has made me go :( ARG ARG ARG WAHAHA CHU CHU :P. I asked my philosophy professor and he told me to shut up and go back to taking my test. I asked the security guard in Hartley and she didn’t hear me because she was reading the Spec. I asked my friend Oscar and he said that he didn’t know. HELP ME Mr. Bwog. You’re my only hope.

Your bestest friend of all,

Christopher L

Hi Chris.

You can just call us Bwog, although we do take the royal ‘we’. Kidding. Maybe.

We’re a bit divided on this issue, but the staff has a few possible criteria for defining at what point you really level up.

  • “You are a sophomore once you get enough credits. So if you pass all your frosh classes, yes.”
  • “‘Rising _____’ is a real thing invented for situations like this.”
  • “Technically not until you’re back at school, but bitches love older guys, so say you’re a sophomore anyway”

Take that as you will, Chris. Bwog is sitting pretty at supersupersupersenior status, so we don’t have any trouble with the ladies.

Love,
Bwog

 

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16 Comments

  • this question is a lie says:

    @this question is a lie no one reads spec

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Actually, the Hartley Public Safety Officers do.

  • a few criterion says:

    @a few criterion exams gettin’ to ya?

    1. Marcus says:

      @Marcus Actually though. Fixed now.

  • Vladimir says:

    @Vladimir Вы глупы ублюдок!

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous No way

  • why would says:

    @why would anybody be in a rush to be considered a sophomore…

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous why would anyone want to remain at the bottom of the totem pole?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous the only thing more offensive than that youtube link is this shitty, heteronormative/misogynistic bwog post

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous and pointless. utterly pointless.

    2. how do you know says:

      @how do you know bwog isn’t a lady pursuing other ladies? maybe you’re the heteronormative one.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous The fifth and fourth birthday links are the same.

  • Criterion says:

    @Criterion Hey Bwog,

    “Criterion” is the singular form. If you a have a few, you have criteria.

  • joseph says:

    @joseph when u finish ur senior year in high school, are you considered a freshman

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous “Referance” …C’mon, Bwog, you can do it. We’re almost done!

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Dear Bwog, the title of this post should have read “What? FRESHMAN is evolving!” Your inaccurate pokemon/90s/childhood referencing skills sadden me to the core.

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