Does the SEAS hat count as decoration?

Libby Kandel and Christina Clark, aka Bwog’s kangaroos of room-hopping, went to get the story behind the intriguingly bare room of a John Jay resident.

“Did you just get robbed?” would be an appropriate question when you walk into the room of Resident X* on John Jay 13. He’ll shrug his shoulders and say, “I don’t need a lot of stuff…I like my room plain. My future house will look like this; I would not compromise. Even for a woman.”

The barren walls might seem cold and uninviting, but the three combs, hairbrush, and array of hair products should assure you that Resident X occasionally appears in the presence of others. When he does he will be sure to rock one of his Ikea satchels and estimated 15 pairs of grey pants.

One might think Resident X is anti-consumer culture, but really, he just doesn’t like things. One thing he takes particular offense to is the modern blender. “So many things in this world have experienced technological advancement, but the blender is not one them. Like even the most high tech ones at Jamba Juice have to be cleaned with a spoon.” Statements like these and his room may explain why one of his floormates immediately assumed he was a SEAS kid. Another just assumed he was a serial killer.

This may also be because he has no pictures of his family anywhere, but rather a startling amount of cleaning products. His explanation: “You don’t have pictures of your family until you’re like 40…..right?”

Bwog closed the meeting by asking, “If your life depended on decorating your room, what would you put on your walls?” After a moment of reflection: “Blank wallpaper.”

*he requested that his name not be included.