Our face when Jarrett jumped off the balcony

Our face when Jarrett jumped off the balcony

After about a month of confusion about who would take over John Boehner’s seat as Speaker of the House of Representatives, former VP candidate and Congressman Paul Ryan will become the new Speaker. (Politico)

Owen Labrie, former St. Paul’s student charged with sexual assault of a younger female classmate, was sentenced to one year in jail followed by probation. Can’t say we’re sad to hear this conviction considering Labrie’s council claimed it was punishment enough to have him register as a sex offender. (Washington Post)

China’s “one-child policy” was overturned yesterday, allowing couples to now legally have two children. (NY Times)

A story posted on Twitter by a young woman named Zola’s incredible and unforgettable trip to Florida recently went viral. All she wanted to do was bond over her hoeism with Jess. (Time)

P.S. Happy Halloween from us to you! :-)

Basic bitch expressions via Shutterstock