It happens once in a red moon, so take advantage of it #turnt

It happens once in a red moon, so take advantage of it #turnt

From a week of incessant testing (“midterms”), indecisive weather, and widespread incredulity over the first Columbia football victory in three years (!!!), emerge love, sex, disappointment, and Butler (always in the backdrop)—just don’t go as far as the dead bird we found, gone too soon from the NYC skyline. Congrats to all first-years for surviving their first week of tests, and continue to send in any observations about your week(end) to

Studyin’ (Or Not) Through The Pain

  • “Spent the night throwing up and delirious and still managed to make a poster board for my pchem lab group.”
  • Related: “So sick that I walked all the way to strength training, got a whiff of sweat, turned around and left.”
  • “My history professor didn’t clarify which chapter from this 500 page book we need to read for our weekly response. Now I’m debating which parts to read, if at all, while crying into my coffee.”
  • “Brought my friend a mason jar of whiskey while studying at Hungarian. She requested it to ‘clear out her sinuses.'”
  • “Just realised I actually slept through a meeting with my LitHum professor lol.”
  • “Somehow during the past two hours that I’ve been working in the Sulz study lounge my job has become telling everyone who comes in that the printer is out of ink (and redirecting them to the Brooks computer lab).”

It Sounds Like Love

  • “Was just stopped in Riverside Park for a picture of my knees.”
  • “Going on my first tinder date ever.”
  • “I think i’m in love with Rashid Khalidi…ugh.”
  • “Girlfriend in town because other schools treat Columbus Day like a holiday.”
  • “Punk-looking boy just walked past my window playing harmonica. On Broadway.”
  • “Wow a Carman janitor forced me to look into the lactation room and then told me all of his daughter’s struggles with breastfeeding.”
  • “Forced my suitemate to watch classic Jeff Goldblum movies and watched as she swooned at the transformation scene in Earth Girls Are Easy. Like……I would trade a non-essential organ to get with Jeff Goldblum (at any age!).”
  • “Was woken up at 4 am by my suitemate having sex in our bathroom. Said suitemate broke the towel rack.”
  • “Keep getting texted by a super clingy, oblivious guy who I met during NSOP. No, I don’t want to study Physics with you.”
  • “Pushed my bed together with my roommate’s and six of us Netflixed and chilled.”
  • “Riding the subway with my friend, this guy was sitting in a corner seat with a string bass rested on top of him, and for a second my friend didn’t see the guy and said, ‘Wow, that is a really independent bass.'”

“Turning Up” Pre/Post Win

  • “A friend and I were first in line for sweetgreen today.”
  • “Went to this Italian heritage thing hosted by the mayor at the Met (I’m not Italian I’m Scandinavian lol), so I’ve been drunk since 7.”
  • “Just got a free Nuss bagel at work.”
  • “Got so crossed last night that I can still feel it this morning.”
  • “Said ew to a friend as a homeless man passed us and he thought I said it about him. I feel terrible.”
  • “Found out the Smurfs originated in Belgium as “Les Schtroumpfs.” Looked up “Smurfs” in other languages. Dutch: De Smurfen. German: Die Schlümpfe. Spanish: Los Pitufos.”
  • “Faded af.”
  • “Was so tired yesterday I accidentally lit my hand-rolled cig from the filter end (in broad daylight). Wasn’t expecting there to be a filter at all. Guess I thought it was a joint.”
  • “From room overlooking Broadway: three CAVA sightings thus far and the night is young.”
  • “Kept awake by some weird blips and beeps from my suitemate’s avant garde noise crap. It sounds like a fucking deep space satellite probe crash landed in our kitchen.”
  • “Eulogized the life of a blow up doll.”
  • “My fingers hurt from too much sewing. #cultofdomesticity”
  • “Friedman’s served my vegan friend eggs and refused to refund her.”
  • “Ate 2 pieces of shitty vegan “pizza” at Ferris in addition to a vegan pumpkin scone, a vegan p&b cookie, a vegan cupcake, and a vegan brownie earlier today and I wanna vegan die.”
  • “One of my suitemates is gone for the weekend and the other has disappeared tonight with my charger locked in his room. I have 1 percent battery.”
  • “A friend and I found a dead bird last night at Barnard.”