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To The Witch Who Cursed Me

ding, dong, the curse is dead

Events Editor Isabel Sepúlveda is having a terrible, awful, no-good, very bad start to the semester and she would very much like it to stop now.

It started as soon as I moved in, when I had to walk to Hartley Hospitality Desk twice in an hour because my ID failed to encode. A few hours later, I locked myself in my room (which I would do again two days later, this time also locking my phone in so I couldn’t even call my roommate to come save me). My laptop died 24 hours before the semester started. I was half an hour late to my first day at a new job because I got lost on the wrong floor. The $3 umbrella I bought at the Green Sale had the audacity to break the first time I used it. Similar inconveniences (and some full-on calamities) have been non-stop since I arrived.

At first, I thought I just was having a bit of bad luck here and there. But after over a week of disasters, I’ve come to the only conclusion possible: I have angered a witch, and they’ve put a curse on my semester.

So, to the witch who cursed me: I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I did to hurt you. Maybe I was your waitress this summer and didn’t bring your food fast enough. Maybe I bumped into you on the street during move-in and didn’t apologize. Maybe I stole your favorite seat in Butler last semester or you sent in a late senior wisdom nomination and thought I was actually going to fight you. Or you might at the bottom of the waitlist of a class I’m currently taking. I don’t know what it was, but no matter what, I’m very very very sorry. The beginning of semester is a rough time for all of us and whatever slight I visited upon you couldn’t have helped. I promise I won’t hold it against you.

I just need this gone because midterms will be upon us, and I really can’t afford to be cursed when I’m staring down two exams and three essays the same week. Please lift this curse before I fail all my classes and am forced to drop out of school and move back to rural Pennsylvania. So let me know what I can do to make it up to you. I’ll buy you a cup of coffee or any other drink of your choice to make up for it. I’ll drop that class. Just let me know, because I’m getting kind of desperate here.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go burn some sage in my room, just in case its a haunting instead.

Witch via Bwog Archives

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1 Comment

  • Why don't witches wear panties? says:

    @Why don't witches wear panties? “Because they need to grip the broom.”

    – Todd Packer

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