We have an announcement.
Listen, you and I both know the Milstein 5 gender neutral bathrooms are the place. I might even go as far to call it a “spot.” Whenever I’m in the gender neutral bathroom on Milstein 5, I heavily identify as someone who is in the Milstein 5 gender neutral bathroom. I’m deeply at peace with myself there. Sometimes I even invite other people, just to hang out or take selfies together. It’s a vibe, it’s a spot.
But I am so deeply disturbed from my peace when I know that people are just fucking in there. Stop that. Don’t have sex in the gender neutral bathroom. The men’s bathroom is literally RIGHT THERE. Do whatever things you want there, but not in my literal nirvana. Also, for the people who are like, juuling or smoking in there or whatever, please. This is a holy space. Cheryl and Philip are watching, dude. It’s embarrassing for both of us.
This is my public plea, not a PSA, just asking that you stop doing the things you shouldn’t be doing in the gender neutral bathrooms at Milstein. You know who you are.