Senior Staff Writer Zane Bekheet explains all the reasons she hasn’t paid attention to a single zoom lecture.
The only thing more exciting than the thought of post-pandemic life is finding the many ways to never absorb a single piece of information from an online class. Here are ten notable times I’ve completely ignored my education.
- Because the only thing I’ve looked at the entire class period was my own video to try to figure out how the other classmates perceive me
- I decided to relive my childhood spent at a computer on miniclip.com playing Free Runner 2 and Stacky Zoo
- I suddenly remembered how much the writers messed up the series finale of Game of Thrones and had to sit on the floor in pure fury
- I was scrolling through TikTok and a tarot card reading popped up on my fyp, told me my ex was coming back, and I had to learn how to properly manifest
- My Zoom class crush didn’t show up and I sat staring at the wall contemplating if love is real
- A weird smell from the Wallach 6 lounge made it into my room and killed too many brain cells for me to pay attention
- I spent the entire class period building a $700 cart on shein and ended my perusal by closing out the tab without buying anything
- I heard Duane Reade sold big squish mallows for $15, turned off my video, and walked to 110th to buy four (4).
- I found out Olivia Jade started posting YouTube videos again and sat on my phone scrolling through her hate comments and trying to decide if people can really ~change~
- It was CC class.
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