No, seriously, “caulk” just became a word yesterday.

Wordle has taken the world and bored Columbia students by storm. At this point, waiting for my midnight Wordle treat has actually become waiting for my afternoon class riddle. Many of the five-letter words Wordle has been assigning feel uninspired, but there are some days when they get it right. “CYNIC” being the word of the day on Valentine’s Day and “aroma” being the word the day after being one of those times. Then there are other days where the answer is “caulk,” which you’ve heard before but still had to Google after. Wordle words are probably randomly generated, but they have such powerful connotations to them that I couldn’t help but relate some of them to my view of some of Columbia’s schools.

Columbia College – THOSE

Columbia College acts as the guardian of all humanities and keeper of Lit Hum. When the hopeful applicants write about loving this Core Curriculum, CC is what they envision. Despite this school acting as the marker for the “Columbia experience,” we can’t deny that CC—like “those”—is actually…basic. It’s a safe word with a neutral connotation, yes, but there’s no real fun in that. A boring demonstrative pronoun that I’m sure you could extract more meaning from in a CC core class.

SEAS or Fu – CAULK

I am a CC student, but I’m not basic enough to assign SEAS “robot.” SEAS seems like…a rewarding experience, at least. I wouldn’t know because I am a lowly humanities major, but I do know that for sure that SEAS is at least somewhat difficult. When I received and finally solved this Wordle puzzle on my sixth and final try, I was flabbergasted. It was like doing calculus. Is “caulk” a real word? Yes. Did I have to Google it after to make sure it was a real word? Yes. I’m sure some person out there enjoyed it though. Also, SEAS is newer, and “caulk” just sounds like a new word to me.

Barnard – ALOFT

Unfortunately “bold” and “beautiful” aren’t five-letter words. Neither is the “Year of Science.” Bummer. However, “aloft” is the perfect Barnard word. There’s a certain peace that comes with it. It’s a bit challenging, but the end result is clear. Solving this word made for a positive experience, and I don’t have many bad things to say about it.

GS – KNOLL

Solving this word requires a level of expertise and a correct amount of knowledge about bad JFK assassination theories. I don’t think every General Studies student has to possess that or does, but I feel like this word required some level of experience or unique background knowledge to solve, and GS is full of people with both, so the assignment is natural.

Go forth and do nothing with this information.

Wordle’s crimes via Sahmaya Busby