Have you ever found yourself on College Walk wondering how—and where—Serena and Blair spent their time at Columbia? This guide is for you.

Places They Want You To Believe Are Yale: 

• Dodge Hall
  Listen: whichever director decided to shoot Columbia for Yale when the main cast visits in Season 2 as seniors in high school was obsessed with making the girlies fight in front of Dodge. Dodge is the epicenter of Yale’s campus. It’s the Columbia University building we’re looking at when Gossip Girl says “we hear there’s nothing like Yale in October.” It’s where Blair yells “Yale is MINE!!” at Serena, who is offered early admission purely for being extremely hot and charismatic. It’s the site of an extraordinary number of additional Blair and Serena fights that take place in that same less-than-24-hour period of their lives. It’s even where Chuck blackmails no less than six members of Yale’s most secret secret society, Skull and Bones. 

• Schermerhorn
  If Dodge is the place for confrontation, Schermerhorn is the place for secrets. Specifically, it’s where Chuck gives Serena a key piece of information: every year, Yale’s Dean of Admissions invites a select few prospective students to his house for a reception (gross), where he tests them by asking them which person, real or imagined, living or dead, they would invite to dinner. Blair has spent years perfecting her answer: George Sand, the Dean’s favorite author. At the last minute, Serena steals her answer, and Blair retaliates in a totally rational manner by exposing Serena for manslaughter. Fun Fact: This has actually been a question on the Barnard application for years. “George Sand because she’s your favorite writer” probably would not have made the cut. The jury’s out on whether “The Man I Killed” would.

• Hamilton
  In the GGCU (Gossip Girl Cinematic Universe), Hamilton is a Yale dorm building. In a Shakespearean case of mistaken identity, Dan enters this building looking for a TA in the English department, whom he then inadvertently cockblocks as she’s trying to hook up with Nate, who in turn has been pretending to be Dan to avoid the embarrassment of being associated with his father, Howard, who is the talk of New Haven after his recent arrest for embezzlement. Classic Yale dorm behavior.
  
• Earl
  Chuck is kidnapped just outside by members of Skull and Bones. He thinks they’re trying to recruit him because of his renowned sexual prowess (he is famously 17), but they’re actually looking to exploit his connection to Nate. Lucky for Nate, their best friend bond is unbreakable. Unlucky for everyone else, Earl Hall proves to be the spot where sociopaths go to meet.

• Van Am Quad
  In an attempt to keep Nate safe from Skull and Bones, Chuck directs them to kidnap Dan instead, believing he’s Nate. Their big plan is to tie him to the Van Amringe bust in his underwear, and he’s stuck there until the real Nate comes to save him (with help from the aforementioned cockblocked TA). 

Places Where Nate & Chuck Have Drama 

• College Walk
  This is technically still part of “Yale,” but more importantly, it’s yet another part of campus where two characters have the most absolutely ridiculous drama. This time, it’s because Nate, who discovers the concept of privilege years before the rest of his friend group, realizes his childhood best friend and Trump Jr. allegory Chuck Bass has a bit of a feudalism kink and does not view non-millionaires as human beings. 
  
• In front of the 600s
  Years later, when the gang is in their second year of college and “Yale” has long been forgotten about, Chuck and Nate meet on Columbia’s campus again, this time to have a very awkward conversation in which both men are keeping secrets: Chuck is secretly sleeping with Blair (again), while Nate is in the midst of breaking up with Juliet, who is actually a supervillain hellbent on destroying Serena, who she believes is responsible for imprisoning her brother.

Places Where Blair Generally Schemes and Lies:

• The steps on Riverside & 112th St.
  She lies to Serena about attending a secret club meeting at Hamilton House, Columbia’s premiere secret society.
• Riverside & 116th St.
  She lies to guest star Melissa Fumero about being a Columbia student when she really goes to NYU.
• Riverside & 115th St.
  She lies to guest star Melissa Fumero a second time about being a Columbia student when she really goes to NYU.
• Claremont & 116th St., directly behind Hewitt
  She lies to Nate about lying to guest star Melissa Fumero about being a Columbia student when she really goes to NYU.
• The 116th St. park entrance
  She is discovered lying to Nate about lying to guest star Melissa Fumero about being a Columbia student when she really goes to NYU.

Places Where Serena Almost Gets Caught Having An Affair With Her Professor: 

• In front of Barnard on the corner of 116th & Broadway, by Juliet, who tells her it’s actually weird that she hasn’t slept with a professor yet.
• 116th and Claremont, by Dan, who doesn’t say anything and just sort of broods.

Bonus: Places where everyone who has ever slept with Serena congregates after she gets accused of giving the whole campus STDs (apparently setting a celebrity trend):

Just UTS. To be fair, most of the “Columbia” scenes were filmed there, but this was the only one so clearly touched by Apollo’s gift of prophecy. If this were a subplot on the reboot, they would have called it “Chalameting,” but it was 2010, and Call Me By Your Name was but a glimmer in Luca Guadagnino’s eye.

All images via author