Guest writer Sania Hammad tells a tale of triumph, defeat, and the epic highs and lows of existing in a dorm without air conditioning

Global warming sucks. It’s having devastating and irreversible effects on our ecosystem and threatening our planet’s future. But that’s not what this article is about. One thing that is never mentioned in conversations about climate change is how hard it is to be a college student while the planet is basically burning up. By some hazy logic and unknown reasoning, Barnard College has yet to install air-conditioning in all of its student dorms. And when you take that and throw in a heat wave, you end up with a lot of sweaty freshmen who, for unknown reasons, have yet to learn what deodorant is.  During said heatwave, many students found themselves jumping ship by abandoning their stuffy rooms and finding escape in a cool lounge or library. Take, for example, me and my friends who decided to spend one Saturday afternoon in a lounge in Sulzberger watching some old childhood shows and avoiding going back to our actual rooms. We were looking through Netflix, feeling nostalgic, when a particular show caught our eyes and we remembered something.

On March 27, 2010, Nickelodeon premiered a new show called “Victorious.” It centered around a high schooler named Tori (who was arguably the worst character, but I digress) and her friends Cat, Robbie, Beck, Andre, Trina, and Jade as they attended Hollywood Arts, a performing arts high school. The reason this particular show stood out to us in the moment was because of an episode that we remembered watching as kids.

A few months after the show initially premiered, on June 26, 2010, a new episode of Victorious debuted called “Survival of the Hottest.” In the episode, a heat wave (sound familiar?) sweeps through California and the seven teens decide to take a trip to the beach to cool down. Shortly after getting there, however, they get trapped in their RV (well, besides Ariana Grande’s “Cat” who runs off with some boys and participates in some activities with some weird undertones. Dan Schneider is one freaky man). As they are unable to leave the room that they’re now stuck in, the temperature starts to rise (sound familiar?). With no help in sight, the teens are forced to sit in unbearable heat for hours on end (sound familiar?).

A few hours in, they realize that they have no water. Something that we as students can also relate to, seeing as all the water fountains decided to either break or stop filtering the water the exact same week as a dangerous heat wave. Free warm Gatorade in the lounges can only do so much. Robbie, no longer able to deal with the thirst, gives in and drinks from Beck’s old, uncleaned fish bowl. This action unsurprisingly causes him to vomit into Trina’s bag, something that definitely would have happened to any student who drank straight from the water fountains that had filters on red. The only unrealistic part of the episode is when the friends are actually rescued by Cat and then go have a fun beach day.

Actually finishing the episode made us want to go back to our dorms even less, so instead of torturing ourselves and risking heat stroke, we decided to just stay in the lounge for a while and continue the Victorious binge (sidenote, does anyone remember the episode, “Sleepover with Sikowitz”? That episode was so weird to rewatch I mean what teacher lets their students spend the night at their house?).

Anyway, it’s finally starting to cool down and the water is back to potable. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be cold. To be honest, I’m ready for Disney Channel’s winter Fa- La-La-Lidays. I was always more of a Disney Channel girl anyway.

AC unit via Flickr