Halloweekend: possibly the best fucking holiday of all time. This year’s Halloween did not disappoint, and Bwog shares some of their crazy and/or embarrassing adventures to amuse you. 

Bwog and Rally

• Got chased by a public safety officer in Butler at 3 am on Thursday when I was being drunk and obnoxious in a purple dragon onesie
• Got yelled at for hooking up at an EC party because the girl said “this is NOT that kind of party”
• Got really drunk and came home and made myself mashed potatoes after my roommate was puking and I had to carry her into her bed and undress her
• Crashed a Halloween party of all Australian people on the lower east side
• Got way too lit at the Beta/SigNu thing, went to 1020 after, and knocked down the entire barricade outside
• Did coke in the Lerner bathroom during genderfuck
• Had a friend who was on some hard drugs throw chips at public safety and then got chased by public safety
• My friends visited who are seniors in high school and I introduced them to Columbia parties. they were actually impressed.
• Saw a Columbia kid punch a bouncer. Vowed to never again be around aggro drunk boy energy (a vow that i’ll prob break next weekend tbh)
• Went to a literal ketamine breeding ground narrated by drum & bass and eye glitter (circoloco)
• Was trapped in Q Haus for a while because of the lesbians hooking up on my friend’s bag
• Had my first jello shot
• Went to a Halloween party in EC after pregaming, sat down in the bathroom in the party and had a heart to heart with all my friends.
• Had to bounce from a party real quick because some girl hit my friend in the face then he spat back at her.
• Helped my friend violently yuke in my toilet and haven’t cleaned it up yet.
• Went to bed at 3 am; woke up at 6 to get Absolute then went back to bed.
• Ended up getting very drunk with my entire bartending class, took multiple class shots
• Went clubbing and fell off the table I was standing on
• Was reduced to drinking beer at a frat party and almost threw up bc their basement smelled so bad

Bwog really likes hooking up and other tales

• Matched with a bwogger’s friend on tinder, provoking a bwogcest/bwincest debate
• Made out w two girls at genderfuck and then went and slept with a man.
• Went to DC to dump my bf and had been planning to do it today but then it happened Friday and I awkwardly was left still staying at his apt and we alternated between getting along and arguing/being depressed for the rest of the weekend AND I also slept w him and am now on the delayed train 66 and have to write a LitHum essay that’s due at midnight
• Got dumped by someone I wasn’t technically in a relationship with.
• Had a threesome
• Ended up outing a rando girl at this pregames’ bf when I drunkenly and loudly told my friend we hooked up within earshot (Whoops)
• Slapped my friend for having sex with a girl weeks ago when she was super drunk
• Went on a date with a fuckboy and guess what? Regretted it.
• Politely turned a guy down (again—he shot his shot last year too) and he responded by coming on to me even more strongly. Why are men like this?
• Hooked up with a friend and currently am avoiding him
• Finally found out the name of the girl I keep flirting with at 1020 after I heard someone call her name; she told me her name weeks ago but I was not fully with it when she said it and I’ve been too embarrassed to ask again
• Befriended a group of French grad students after I (unsuccessfully) tried to hit on one of them
• Went to Williamsburg for a concert, drank to help my friend forget, met the singer from one of the bands and he sent me a heart message
• Watched maybe the worst film of all time while getting eaten out (sorry TMI)
• Had a guy ask why I only ever want to have sex with him
• Accidentally came out to my parents after drunkenly updating my sexual preferences on Facebook; celebrated their v positive response to my bisexuality by throwing it down at genderfuck w/ a few other queer leftist labor activists and then trying to steal people’s beers at 1020

Bwog gets Spooky

• Dressed up as Noah Cyrus as a counterpart to Lil Xan
• Attended a Halloween party dressed as Bill Nye the Science Guy; handed out climate change facts to all the other partygoers.
• Went to a party as a manic pixie dream girl
• Thought a guy at the Sig Nu/Beta thing was dressed at Steve Jobs but was in fact dressed as a French philosopher…? It doesn’t get more Columbia than this, people.
• Woke up at 3 pm and carbo-loaded before going out again as James Dean
• Dressed up as a sexy ghost with my boyfriend who donned a Ghostbusters costume.

Bwog is Sad Sometimes

• Cried at a poetry reading.
• Depression napped for 4+ hours.
• Played in the pouring, freezing rain and couldn’t tell if the water on my face was tears or rain
• Cried throughout ‘A Star Is Born’ and felt like an emo
• Had Roti Roll for the first time and fake cried into it from 109 to Butler
• Sprained my ankle at rugby game so now I have one injury per limb 4/4
• Got ditched and stranded in Tribeca
• Lost my phone and some nice dude took the bus to Times Square to return it to me *shoutout to Nelson from New Jersey

Bonus: Bwog Meets People

• Met Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg!!