No, we’re not talking about Santorum, and, yes, we are going to continue referencing years old shock porn. For this edition of 2Girls1Snack, Sam Schipani and Alison Herman adventure along Broadway to find the perfect pick-me-up after a long night’s work. Join them as they sample whipped creams and try to find a big ol’ cup of love. 

Hot chocolate from Joe's

Joe’s at Northwest Corner Building $3.25 for a small

Our first hot chocolate destination was the Joe’s in NoCo. The cocoa aroma was lovely, but the drink was actually very diluted with milk, distracting from the chocolaty taste. The hot chocolate was, however, served at the perfect temperature, just warm enough to give us that jolly winter feeling without searing off our taste buds. The foam topping was also just right; not too thick, and just sweet enough. And, of course, the presentation at Joe’s is unbeatable; who doesn’t want their hot chocolate with a swirly heart or a goofy smiley face? Overall, the hot chocolate tasted like high-class Swiss Miss, but the convenience of having Joe’s on campus is an added bonus.

Rating: 3/5

Oren’s Daily Roast $2.80 for a small

The hottest, the cocoa-est, the best. $2.80 will get you a small at this dependable campus coffee shop, making it the best deal of the bunch, and although the location doesn’t have the convenience of Joe, it’s still less than a block from some dorms. The consistency of the drink is more coffee-like than creamy, and the steaming-hot beverage forms a pleasing contrast with the whipped cream, cocoa powder, and chocolate syrup topping. The result is compulsively drinkable and, as Sam commented, “tastes like Christmas.” Both of us finished our drinks happy, chocolate-mustached, and most importantly, warm.

Rating: 5/5

Crumbs $3.50 for a small

Everyone has been raving about Crumbs since it opened, so we simply had to try their hot chocolate. The first sip was far too hot and burned our tongues; we tried, to no avail, to soothe our wounds with the cold, thick whipped cream slathered on top. The drink was watery and lacked much semblance of a chocolate taste. We were also disappointed to find all the chocolate had sunk to the bottom of the cup. Frustrated that we trekked all the way down to 109th St. and paid $3.50 for such a mediocre drink, we simply had to purchase a cupcake to make up for it (may we suggest the flavor of the month, Chocolate Pecan Pie?)

Rating: 2/5