The Columbia Housing Gods have upgraded your digs. Much thanks to the lovely Joyce Jackson for sharing this definitive list of renovations. Here’s what you can expect

• Carman: Freshies are in for a treat: a glistening new fitness room. Couch muffins can enjoy True Blood marathons on the flat screen televisions just installed in all floor lounges.
• River:  Fancy flooring in rooms, hallways, and lounges. Goodies abound with new flat screen TVs and cushioned furniture in the lounges. Pianists, sick of Schapiro, be merry! There’s a new practice room AND fitness room.
• Printing: There is no less of a chance you’ll be stuck in line behind a dance leader printing 100 flyers with spanking new print stations in River, Watt, and Nussbaum. Also, that sauna of a computer lab in Hartley is moving a few doors down.

Interlude in honor of B’s bun in the oven: (The rest of the upgrades after the jump)

• Schapiro: Flooring, paint, and bathroom upgrades on floors 11-16, and new electronic Ving locks (they light up!) on room doors throughout the building. On the first floor, there are two much-needed new dance studios, plus a small meeting room for club gatherings.
• Hogan: Floors 4, 5, and 6 will enjoy fresh coats of paint. The whole dorm has been fitted out with fancy new doors and furnishings, and new flooring in the kitchen and bathroom. Bathrooms have been split so that the shower and toilet are now separate. LED lighting in the hallways (well some hallways: a Hogan resident confirms that some floors have not yet been graced with diodes), illuminates the new carpet and electronic Ving locks.
• EC: Those coveted 16th floor EC suites received new flooring, furniture, appliances, and bathroom fixtures. Yum.
• Watt: Floors 1 and 2 received refinished hardwood floors, new sinks and shower upgrades. Plus the whole joint got new windows, window gates, and blinds.
• McBain: Floor 2 got a paint job and new hallway flooring.
• 114th Street brownstones, the three former frat houses: The works! Upgraded bathrooms, kitchens, flooring, and common space. According to Joyce Jackson, juniors that requested transfers and transfer students will occupy most of the rooms.
• Furnald: Study comfortably with refinished and reupholstered furniture in the main lounge, illuminated by new sconces.
• Wireless: get net in EC, Schapiro, Harmony and Claremont
• Mysterious video screens will be installed in Carman, Furnald, John Jay, River and Watt. Perhaps they’ll resemble those ones in Butler with the klepto warnings. Or maybe not.
• Bwog’s favorite campus addition are the new water fountains/bottle refill stations. Though the fancy design doesn’t quite compensate for the fact that they only emit a weak trickle. Bwog overheard a hypothesis that this was an evil scheme of the ecowarriors: “This will save tons of water because it takes so long to fill up your water bottle people will just give up and leave.” Practical stuff.
• And, in case you’re curious, seniors quickly snagged the palatial university apartment housing we wrote about earlier this summer. Even with all the worrisome waitlists, everyone guaranteed housing has received an assignment. Exhale.