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Gifts From Housing: The Reno Rundown

The Columbia Housing Gods have upgraded your digs. Much thanks to the lovely Joyce Jackson for sharing this definitive list of renovations. Here’s what you can expect

  • Carman: Freshies are in for a treat: a glistening new fitness room. Couch muffins can enjoy True Blood marathons on the flat screen televisions just installed in all floor lounges.
  • River:  Fancy flooring in rooms, hallways, and lounges. Goodies abound with new flat screen TVs and cushioned furniture in the lounges. Pianists, sick of Schapiro, be merry! There’s a new practice room AND fitness room.
  • Printing: There is no less of a chance you’ll be stuck in line behind a dance leader printing 100 flyers with spanking new print stations in River, Watt, and Nussbaum. Also, that sauna of a computer lab in Hartley is moving a few doors down.

Interlude in honor of B’s bun in the oven: (The rest of the upgrades after the jump)

  • Schapiro: Flooring, paint, and bathroom upgrades on floors 11-16, and new electronic Ving locks (they light up!) on room doors throughout the building. On the first floor, there are two much-needed new dance studios, plus a small meeting room for club gatherings.
  • Hogan: Floors 4, 5, and 6 will enjoy fresh coats of paint. The whole dorm has been fitted out with fancy new doors and furnishings, and new flooring in the kitchen and bathroom. Bathrooms have been split so that the shower and toilet are now separate. LED lighting in the hallways (well some hallways: a Hogan resident confirms that some floors have not yet been graced with diodes), illuminates the new carpet and electronic Ving locks.
  • EC: Those coveted 16th floor EC suites received new flooring, furniture, appliances, and bathroom fixtures. Yum.
  • Watt: Floors 1 and 2 received refinished hardwood floors, new sinks and shower upgrades. Plus the whole joint got new windows, window gates, and blinds.
  • McBain: Floor 2 got a paint job and new hallway flooring.
  • 114th Street brownstones, the three former frat houses: The works! Upgraded bathrooms, kitchens, flooring, and common space. According to Joyce Jackson, juniors that requested transfers and transfer students will occupy most of the rooms.
  • Furnald: Study comfortably with refinished and reupholstered furniture in the main lounge, illuminated by new sconces.
  • Wireless: get net in EC, Schapiro, Harmony and Claremont
  • Mysterious video screens will be installed in Carman, Furnald, John Jay, River and Watt. Perhaps they’ll resemble those ones in Butler with the klepto warnings. Or maybe not.
  • Bwog’s favorite campus addition are the new water fountains/bottle refill stations. Though the fancy design doesn’t quite compensate for the fact that they only emit a weak trickle. Bwog overheard a hypothesis that this was an evil scheme of the ecowarriors: “This will save tons of water because it takes so long to fill up your water bottle people will just give up and leave.” Practical stuff.
  • And, in case you’re curious, seniors quickly snagged the palatial university apartment housing we wrote about earlier this summer. Even with all the worrisome waitlists, everyone guaranteed housing has received an assignment. Exhale.

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22 Comments

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Bwog. I love you, but really? “Shapiro”? “Clepto”? And not telling us where the new water bottle filling station is?

    1. Anonymouse says:

      @Anonymouse There are a few; I’ve seen them in John Jay and Hartley so far. The real issue with them is that the water pressure is so awful that it takes 2-3 minutes to fill up a one liter bottle. Also that the water fountain parts don’t actually work because of said lack of water pressure.

    2. Claire says:

      @Claire It was late, we were a little drunk. All should be in order now — thank you for your vigilance!

  • WHAT says:

    @WHAT NEW FITNESS ROOM?! YESSSSSS

  • 2014 says:

    @2014 any word on barnard housing updates?

  • ... says:

    @... Are there any reasons for me to feel good about living in Broadway?

    1. *jazz hands* says:

      @*jazz hands* oh wait.

      1. bwog says:

        @bwog please favorite this comment.

        1. Anonymous says:

          @Anonymous haaaa bwog thrives on the ambiguity of commenters.

  • allergic says:

    @allergic What EC highrise floors got rid of carpets?

    1. Last year says:

      @Last year I saw 14 last year, assuming 16 was redone to match. Don’t know about others.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Is the “fancy flooring” in River hardwood? Or still carpet?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous s/harley/hartley

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous What about the other floors in Schapiro? :/

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Forget True Blood, Bwog. You should watch Weeds. The NYPD are about to bust Nancy’s rivals: the Columbia-based pot dealers of Pouncy House.

    1. Sookeh Stackhouse says:

      @Sookeh Stackhouse True Blood = God tier

      1. Breaking Bad and Louie says:

        @Breaking Bad and Louie owns all.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous would it be weird for upperclassmen to use the gym in carman? walking to dodge in winter…

  • LLC-er says:

    @LLC-er I had a dream that all of the C suites in the LLC were renovated into retro bowling alleys with cafes and nice tvs. Then I remembered that we’re the laughing stock of res-life and that I’m pretty sure the buildings haven’t been touched since the late 80s.

  • A NEW GYM IN CARMAN?! says:

    @A NEW GYM IN CARMAN?! the FIRST thing housing should do is renovate the filthy bathrooms in McBain. Carman already has a 4-1 ratio…

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous I think the the poster meant for you to favorite the comment they replied to!

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous That’s the joke.

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