All our friends ready to rock out.

We have all gotten jiggy to the jams at Ferris. The Ferris Pandora stations are way better than your frat party DJs. Here is a list of songs that would never grace the Ferris Speakers.

Note: This list is not applicable to JJ’s. JJ’s goes hard.

1. La Macarena, Various Artists – Imagine doing all the moves with a chicken Quesadilla in one hand and grape Fanta in the other. What a mess.
2. My Neck, My Back (Lick It), Khia – When it’s so packed in line that someone’s ponytail dips into your Pasta Primavera.
3. Hit or Miss, Jacob Sartorious – When you didn’t check the CU Dining App before giving up a swipe. Also, Ew.
4. Afternoon Delight, Starland Vocal Band – Just take your frosted Banana Cake and gtfo.
5. Threw It On The Ground, The Lonely Island – For obvious reasons.
6. It Wasn’t Me, Shaggy – When someone asks who took the last little bit of Parmesan.
7. Lose Yourself, Eminem – When you spot a table upstairs,“You better never let it go”.
8. Bad n Boujee, Migos (Feat. Lil Uzi Vert) – When you use the hella large pepper grinder and garnish your salad with the white wine vinaigrette.
9. Breaking Free, High School Musical – When you slide into Ferris without having to swipe. You sneak.
10. Bitch Better Have My Money, Rihanna – Replace “Money” with “Strawberries”.

It must be aliens

If you are one of the few fortunate souls who are able to get into Mel’s on a Friday or Saturday night, then you definitely would have suffered through this travesty.

It’s past midnight, the line outside of Mel’s is out of control. The apartment party ran out of booze and tequila shots are just what you need. You use your Mel’s hookup to cut the line and before you know it, you are thrust into the sticky, claustrophobic, and  off-kilter throng. But hold on, something’s off. Is the floor stickier than usual? Is the lighting especially bad? Did someone just yack? No! You were dead wrong. It’s the music!

Green Day! Then another Green Day song. You brace yourself for Bowling for Soup’s “1985.” A few lackluster Nelly songs from the early 2000’s blares as you choke down another tequila shot. Then the unexplainable occurs. Blink 82’s “All The Small Things” plays. You pinch yourself, look around, and make sure of your surroundings. The lacrosse team and FIJI brothers reassure you that you are in fact at Mel’s, but something is definitely off.

At around 2AM, you are sufficiently angry. Not one jam from this year or this decade have played yet. You want to let loose but you can’t exactly groove with your friends to “Welcome to the Black Parade.” After losing patience, you manage to bust a move to Avril Lavigne. As the sweat drips down your back and a smile breaks out on your face, the music choice no longer matter. As the Mel’s crowd disperses and makes its way to 1020, so do you.

Running almost, you arrive at 1020. There is no line. For a second, it seems that the stars have aligned. The bouncer greets you with a smile as he stamps “Approved” on your hand. At this point, you casually stroll in looking for an empty booth. But then you clutch the closest wall and mouth agape, slide to the ground dumbstruck. Your friends lift you up, waving hands in front of you, trying to wipe the look of shock off your face.

Taylor Swift’s “Look What You Made Me Do” reverberates throughout the tight space. You look around at the theatre majors, creative writing majors, and architecture students for any signs of confusion. Everyone is content. Then, you turn towards the big screen in the back. This time, unable to contain your shock, you pass out. Above your head, the music video is playing in sync with the song. The theatre students and RATROCK club members sing along un-ironically as you are wheeled into a CAVA ambulance.

Image via Rama 

Ooooh mysterious conspiracies and secrets.

Every Tuesday Bwog brings you a recap of the previous night’s Engineering Student Council (ECS) meeting. Bureau Chief Finn Klauber recounts this week’s ESC meeting which covered a range of topics, from increasing student-faculty interaction to the scheduling of midterms.  

Seeing how Engineering Student Council blocked off an entire discussion section for a ~private~ discussion—which is the third occasion in the past three weeks where ESC discussed a topic privately—this week’s recap of ESC will be in the form of extended updates.

President Aida Lu

• President Lu met with Dean Brovman, Associate Dean for Undergraduate Student Affairs and Global Programs within SEAS, and discussed a variety of ways to increase student-faculty interaction within SEAS. The brunt of the conversation concerned a proposal for “faculty chats,” which would occur twice or three times a semester. The chats would take the form of question-and-answer periods with a panel of two to three faculty, followed by a reception.
• The SEAS Dean’s Travel Fund, which funds student groups’ travel to engineering-specific conferences and competitions, increased to $17,000 due to matching contributions from the Dean’s Office and ESC.
• ESC is hoping to facilitate student interest in SEAS Study Abroad, “which [Dean] Brovman likes to call ‘STAB,'” by reiterating that, as President Lu put it, “study abroad for SEAS students is possible.”

Click here to see other updates

Back in May (I know, we miss summer too) Sian Beilock was announced as the eighth president of Barnard College and  earlier this week SGA met with Beilock in an “oh so new format” to discuss a multitude of totally different things, including Barnard and Columbia’s interesting relationship. If you weren’t one of the 200 who live streamed the meeting, Barnard Bwogger Dassi Karp covered the meeting so concisely that you still don’t have to! 

The mic is purely for aesthetic, we won’t actually use it. What is a mic? Covfefe

This week, Barnard’s Student Government Association Representatives welcomed the new president of the College, Sian Beilock, to share her feelings about her job so far and what she hopes to work on in the future. In her honor, perhaps, or maybe just because they were getting bored with the endless stream of student and administrative guests, our Rep Council did things a little bit differently. Emphasis on the little: this week’s change consisted of a microphone that was never used and, more importantly, a livestream of the entire meeting on SGA’s Facebook page. University Senator Kira Dennis adeptly operated the iPhone doing the recording, and everybody behaved themselves under the pressure of the camera. This enough would be something to celebrate–change happens very slowly with the SGA. But Beilock also had some interesting things to say.

(more…)

The New York Times reported yesterday that a graduate student is suing Columbia over “deliberate indifference” to claims of sexual harassment. The student, who remains anonymous, alleges that William V. Harris, a professor of Greco-Roman History, forced himself upon her, and that when she reported the harassment to colleagues and university officials, they did not take the proper steps to investigate or stop the behavior. The student claims, too, that the University has long known about Harris’s allegedly predatory behavior toward female students but has failed to address it.

The student says that she met Harris at a lecture in 2014, and he offered to mentor her. The student claims that his behavior slowly escalated over the course of their weekly one-on-one meetings–she says he groped her multiple times and requested sexual intercourse. She also claims that he asked her to accompany him on a professional trip, but only booked one hotel room and tried to engage in sexual contact.

The student reported this behavior to the University, but told the Times that she decided to file the civil suit because she was displeased with the lack of progress the University has made in investigating the allegations.

Harris is currently teaching two undergraduate courses–Roman Social History and the Environmental History of the Ancient Mediterranean.

The University released the following statement to us:

We treat any claim of harassment or other gender-based misconduct in our community with the utmost seriousness, but we do not comment in the press on allegations made in legal complaints.

Happening Around The World: Following violent clashes in Cameroon, Bamenda is on lockdown. Whilst the lockdown isn’t official, internet services have been shut down in the region and although MTN (the countries largest internet provider) cited “internet problems” as the cause many suspect that internet in the region is being deliberately blocked. (BBC) 

Kendall fix this with a pepsi please

Happening In The U.S: In the wake of yesterdays tragic events, gun and ammunition manufacturers across the United States have seen a rise of up to 3% in their shares. Economists attribute this to fears/anticipation of tighter gun control. Disturbingly these stock surges appear to be on trend, as shares rose following the tragedies of 9/11 and the San Bernardino attack. (BBC)

Happening In NYC: When flicking through your favourite festival pics, you may remember the infamous ‘Fyre Festival’ (the luxurious festival in the Bahamas promoted by models like Bella Hadid and Kendall Jenner) that turned out to be a cataclysmic event leaving masses of people stranded in the Bahamas. Billy McFarland, the man behind the event, pleaded not guilty to two counts of fraud at Manhattan federal court earlier this week. (NY Daily News)

Happening On Campus: Want to procrastinate creatively? Head on over to a special screening of Bronx Gothic; a coming of age story that combines dance, drama and comedy in Barnard Hall at 7pm, which will be followed by an in conversation session with actress Okwui Okpokwasili and director Andrew Rossi. Alternatively, you could pop along to 418 James’ Room, Barnard, at 7pm to enjoy the Queer Awareness Month Opening Ceremony.

Food Of The Day: Looking for fuel for those late Butler nights? Grab a one dollar white chocolate, cranberry and macadamia  cookie from Nussbaum!

Overheard: 

Person 1: “F*ck, I can’t believe I have midterms already, it’s not even the middle of term”

Person 2: “Dude I know, wasn’t NSOP like..last week?”

Image via  Georges Biard