An Arbitrary Ranking Of A Cappella Groups
Written by Bwog Staff
Do you care about a cappella on campus? Neither do we, but it’s final concert season, and we thought we’d take a look at the different groups on campus who are funded by our student life fees and air out some of our gripes.
Disclaimer (added 6:45 pm): This post is entirely satirical, entirely based on experiences of Bwog staff members, and does not intend to make serious allegations against any Columbia a cappella groups. We encourage you, dear reader, to attend as many (or as few) a cappella concerts as you wish, and make your own judgments accordingly.
- Uptown Vocal – Probably the best musically (especially because you don’t have to suffer through any shitty Adele covers).
- Nonsequitur – Next best musically. Generally not annoying. Whatever.
- Bacchantae – All-women (nice), and apparently they’re really good this year?
- Metrotones – They keep a low profile (thank god), and various Bwoggers are fans.
- Sur – Not super well-known, but do a cool job of mixing South Asian music with pop songs.
- SHARP – Our initial thought was “they could get it,” but upon further reflection, we feel like the SHARP guys are the type to say they’re “feminists” but actually treat women like shit in real life.
- Notes and Keys – Basically a show choir because they let in too many people last year. Were invited to perform at Lin-Manual Miranda’s house. Probably fine singers, but we don’t care enough to know. Annoying on social media.
- Jubilation! and Pizmon – Tied because we’ve never heard of them and they’re both religious groups, we guess? We prefer hymns to Demi Lovato covers anyway.
- Clefhangers – Never heard of them before looking up “a cappella groups” on WikiCU.
- Kingsmen – Ugh. They once went into the fridge at a party and drank all of our craft beer. Who the fuck does that? Fuck them.
EDIT, 5:06 pm: We forgot two a cappella groups! Oops! Sorry, Metrotones and Sur. Let us know if we missed any others in the comments.
Microphone via Public Domain
Tags: a cappella, bacchantae, email email@example.com if you want to join our a cappella group, jazz standards, kingsmen, nonsequitur, notes and keys, SHARP, ugh, uptown vocal, we're starting an a cappella group for people who can't read music