Barnard SGA Election Results Are In!
"I'm a future world leader!"

“I’m a future world leader!”

Barnard’s SGA election results were just announced via email.  Not all posts were filled, so some will be available for application in the coming weeks.  Below are the positions, names and UNIs of the new officers.

SGA President
Julia Qian | jq2210@barnard.edu

VP for Student Government
Sarah Shuster | scs2173@barnard.edu

VP for Campus Life
Shivani Vikuntam | sv2399@barnard.edu

VP for Finance
Pascale Dugue | pjd2121@barnard.edu

VP for Communications
Emily Klein | esk2154@barnard.edu

University Senator as well as several other positions are below.

It’s Teatime
From left: Bwog, Tanay

From left: Bwog, Tanay

The commencement bleachers have gone up, we’ve posted our call for Senior Wisdoms, and in one short week it will be May. For many seniors, this means that the time to say goodbye to Columbia and the relationships formed here is quickly approaching. One senior, Tanay Jaipuria, SEAS ’14, decided that he wants to make the most of his last few weeks here and has set up a website—Tea with Tanay—to help him do just that.

The website allows anyone who so desires to sign up to get tea—and hopefully enjoy some good conversation—with Tanay for half an hour.  The site is aesthetically simple and thus very welcoming, which we later learned was a deliberate choice by Tanay.  For those who aren’t easily convinced, he links to his Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn profiles to reassure you that he is in fact “quite normal.”  He even gives you conversation ideas, from speakeasies and Marcus Aurelius to Taylor Swift (kindred spirits) and selfies.  Enthused by his techniques, we sent our resident tea teacher Eric Cohn to talk to him.

Bwog: What gave you the idea to start this?

Tanay: A big part of it was that I’m a senior…and I realized that I’m not going to see a lot of these people again, especially the ones moving away from New York. Also the fact that I made some of my really good friends in senior year.  And I realized: what if there are more people like that, who I would never get the chance to see again?  Most people have a group they hang out with, and, especially once you’re a junior or senior, you won’t really go out of that group that much.

B: How has the response been so far?

T: Last I checked, there have been like a 110 responses.  About fifty are complete strangers, like people on campus I have never seen before.  Another fifty are acquaintances and some of my really close friends who signed up to support me early on.  And then there are about ten or thirty random Russian ones which I think was just spam because they randomly found it.

Has it been mostly seniors, and why did he choose tea? Click to see the rest of the interview.

Congrats To The CC Val And Sal!
Hats off to you

Hats off to you

Columbia College announced today that Margarete Diaz Cuadros and Samuel Walker have been named 2014′s Columbia College valedictorian and salutatorian, respectively.

Margarete hails from Lima and is majoring in biochemistry. She’ll be continuing her current research and going for her Ph.D. in molecular genetics. Walker is a comparative literature major from Westchester whose senior thesis “is so advanced, it reads like the first draft of a doctoral thesis.” They both have very impressive and glowing bios, which you can read below the jump.

Congrats!

Read about your talented peers.

CCSC Debates About Constitutional Review
All of this is very esoteric

All of this is very esoteric

Every week, CCSC meets and talks about very important things.  This week, those thing included reforms to their constitution—particularly about the sections dealing with the filling of vacated seats. Much talk was had about transparency, efficiency, and fraternity, all of which our Satow Room Bureau Chief Joe Milholland was present to cover.

On Sunday night’s Columbia College Student Council meeting, the council addressed various constitutional reforms they will be voting on next week. The most prominent was discussing how and when CCSC should have special elections for seats vacated mid-term. Before, CCSC, like Columbia’s other undergraduate councils, has appointed new members after resignations. This academic year, however, their have been two special elections that have chosen a new University Senator and a new class council member.

VP of Policy Bob Sun said that having two ways of filling a vacancy was “not efficient” and that the council should choose between either going back to having only appointments but with a defined, “transparent” process or go exclusively to special elections.

Jeremy Meyers, Chair of the Elections Board, told the council that he was able to experiment with new things during this year’s special elections, but the special elections were hard on the board because they had to “drop everything for 2-3 weeks.” Because of this, Meyers does not think it is “sustainable” or “possible “ for the Elections Board to keep doing special elections, especially when considering the difficulties to recruit new Elections Board members. According to Meyers, in order to carry out special elections, the board needs to organize mixers, approve posters, organize voting, and answer questions from candidates.
Read on for elections and frats.

2girls1snack: Holy Guacamole Edition
Ugh, yum.

NOMZ

As Passover nears its end, those of you who observe Passover have likely exhausted all Matzo cracker combinations and get mad whenever your friends suggest going out for a meal. However, this edition of 2 Girls 1 Snack is Passover-friendly as long as you substitute chips with Matzo crackers. Even if you’re not Jewish, there are so many places near campus that offer chips and guac that we thought we’d help you make informed decisions just in time for Cinco de Mayo! Note: One of these Bwoggers is an immigrant Latina and grew up with authentic guacamole so the standards are set pretty high (5 is reserved for her homestyle guac).

Amigos: $9.80, includes fresh guac, fresh chips, and home-made salsa
Though it is the most expensive and requires you wait 5 minutes, Amigos’ guacamole undoubtedly has the best texture and taste. It has the perfect mix of flavors: lemon, avocado, tomato, onion, and it is all fresh. Not like made-that-morning fresh, I mean they make each batch from scratch the moment you order it, meaning you can customize it and chose any level of spiciness (Bwog wasn’t feeling too courageous so we went for medium). With regards to their chips, they are saltier than Taqueria’s but are so thin they are bound to disappoint those of you who try to heavy-load your chips (a few of Bwog’s chips snapped in the guac, but not the Matzo crackers–that stuff is sturdy like a brick). All in all, it is definitely worth the money as the guac not only tastes and feels the best (and probably has the best quality ingredients), but also because the small side salsa that automatically comes with the chips is AMAZING.

Rating: 4.8/5
Pros: Customizability, freshness, perfect combination of ingredients, comes with salsa, Amigos ambiance
Cons: Most expensive

Read on for ever more deliciousness.

From The Issue: Bluenotes
Illustration by Angel Jiang, CC '15

Illustration by Angel Jiang, CC ’15

Each issue of The Blue and White has three short pieces that depict some interesting tidbit of campus or New York life, in 300 words or less. This issue, Senior Editor Luca Marzorati, CC ’15, brings you the story of pirate radio in the city, contributor Nia Brown, CC ’17, presents the history of the Croton Reservoir Aqueduct, and contributor Alex Warrick, BC ’17, unwraps the mystery of the controversial “STUPID PEOPLE SHOULN’T BREED” bench on Barnard’s quad. The issue is on campus now, pick up a copy!

Who owns the air? This philosophical question is painfully real for some, including DJ Fresh Kid (AKA Sean Bruce, age 40) who was arrested last July in Brooklyn for operating a pirate radio station. The Fresh Kid was a regular DJ on the Fire Station (104.7 FM), which broadcasted Caribbean music in the outer regions of Brooklyn without a license. Because of a change in New York state law that designated unlicensing broadcasting as a class A misdemeanor, both the Fresh Kid and Solomon Malka, a Fire Station employee, could face jail time.

Fire Station’s collapse marked a shift in the decades-long battle between pirate radio and its legal competitors. Supporters of “big radio” and the Federal Communications Commission claim that unlicensed stations interfere with broadcasts, while pirate radio backers counter that they provide an essential service in underserved communities: only 51 percent of New Yorkers speak English at home, yet 86 percent of FM stations are in English. And besides, they argue, the air should be free. But the threat of jail time has forced many pirate radio operators into hiding, or online streaming.

A Freedom of Information Act request revealed that WKCR, Columbia’s radio station at 89.9 FM, is not spared from the interference of pirate operators. In the northern reaches of Manhattan and pockets of Brooklyn, some hopeful WKCR listeners instead hear “Quisqueya FM”—a station aimed at Dominican listeners broadcasting from the Bronx at 89.7 FM—or “Love Gospel Radio”—a Caribbean gospel station run by Grace Assembly Deliverance Temple on Boston Road. Attempts to contact these operators were unsuccessful; perhaps many fear becoming the next DJ Fresh Kid.

Nonetheless, pirate radio remains a presence on the New York soundscape. Turn the dial just past the static, and a world of eclectic music awaits. Walking around New York with a portable radio reveals the depth of unlicensed transmissions: the drone of Hebrew prayers in outer Brooklyn; the mellifluent tone of a French Creole talk show in upper Manhattan; the sticky urgency of patois on the streets of the Bronx. In a city of a hundred tongues, the pirate beat goes on.

- Luca Marzorati

What about that Croton Reservoir Aquaduct?

Bwoglines: Who Needs Money When You Have _____? Edition
We find that simply the appearance of being literate is enough to justify a vaguely superior air

We find that simply the appearance of being literate is enough to justify a vaguely superior air

Herb – Photos and coverage of the Easter holiday in Denver yesterday. (Gawker)

Poetry – There’s a lot of poetry in America don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. (Al-Jazeera America)

Money – People think the guy who runs MOMA isn’t snobby enough. (NYT)

A Country Beholden to a Single, Empty State - Corn is not an efficient source of fuel, say people not from Iowa. (Al-Jazeera America)

A mug which is used with a pinky that is raised via Shutterstock

Give Us Your Wisdom
shutterstock_154640318

Grey-eyed Athena watches from her perch

Dear seniors, friends of seniors, and those who wish they were seniors: It’s time for one of our greatest traditions to return: we’re starting our call for Senior Wisdoms. For freshpersons/transfers/people who hate joy, Senior Wisdoms are an annual feature where we ask outgoing seniors to share the knowledge and advice they’ve culled from their four years at Columbia. Responses are inevitably hilarious, slightly dangerous, extremely insightful, and generally awesome (not to mention a fantastic procrastinatory tool during finals weeks). Here’s how it works:

  1. Nominate a graduating senior who you think is a fantastic human being and should have their wise words shared with the general public.
  2. Email wisdom@bwog.com with (a) some basic information about your friend, and (b) why you think they should get a senior wisdom (think personal qualities rather than their résumé).

If they make the cut, we’ll get in touch with them while you sit back and bask in how funny/right about life your classmates are. A huge number of nominations come in each year, so move quickly—and give some great reasons for part (b)—to see your friends’ names up in lights! We’ll also be a little more selective this year; no pouting. Love, Bwog

Owl throwing shade via Shutterstock

EventHop: SupercalifragilisticexpialidOrchesis
Say that ten times fast.

Say that ten times fast.

Bwog loves to dance but unfortunately was not gifted with the moves. Luckily Orchesis held a performance last night: the tongue-twisting SupercalifragilisticexpialidOrchesis. Daily Editor Tatini Mal-Sarkar went to watch and ended up consumed with dance envy.

Last night, I entered Roone to the dulcet tunes of Mary Poppins. The last dance performance I went to was my mom’s best friend’s eleven-year-old daughter’s Jazzercise showcase, and despite the inclusivity of Orchesis, I highly doubted that that translated to quite the same quality.

And thank God for that. SupercalifragilisticexpialidOrchesis was great. Though it wasn’t always the most technical show I’ve ever seen (those eleven-year-olds, man), it more than made up in spirit. The huge cast and the prominence of Beyoncé in the lineup made the show an extremely enjoyable experience, even for a dance weenie like myself.

The show began with Victoria Robson’s “Saltimbanco.” The piece, choreographed to a number from Cirque du Soleil, was vibrant and lively, had some great lifts, and, despite the large cast size, still appeared crisp and well-coordinated. A similar level of skill was demonstrated by the second performance, titled “Spectacle” and choreographed by Ivy Vega. Both pieces somehow encapsulated an overall feeling of strength and power, heightened in the second by the costuming. The turtleneck crop tops (like Beyoncé, a common theme throughout the night) highlighted the unbelievable physical strength of the dancers, while also emphasizing their flexibility and grace. The next piece, however, was a bit of a disappointment. “Mother Yashoda” (by Natasha Antony) had so much potential – a Bollywood piece in the midst of Mary Poppins heaven? Sign me up! But the moves felt stiff and uncomfortable, and Bollywood, though extravagant, is not intended to seem limiting in its antics.

Hold me closer tiny dancer(s)

Bwog Meeting: Save Yourself!

Stacks on Stacks of Snacks!

“Its first effect is sudden violent, uncontrollable laughter; then come dangerous hallucinations—space expands—time slows down, almost stands still…fixed ideas come next, conjuring up monstrous extravagances—followed by emotional disturbances, the total inability to direct thoughts, the loss of all power to resist physical emotions… leading finally to acts of shocking violence… ending often in incurable insanity.”

—the dire consequences of marihuana not attending Bwog meetings.

Don’t submit to insanity. Come to Bwog, 7 PM in the SGO, Lerner 5th Floor. Free snacks and fine company.

Columbia Is A Venerated Ivy League Institution

Suck it, #OurBlue. Back in the day, Columbia was proud of its lack of school pride and brazen celebration of illicit activities. In fact, it has become something of a tradition on the twentieth day of April for Bwog to dig through its archives and dredge up memories best forgotten of undergraduates long graduated. Warning: this video contains obscenity, drug use on the steps, and offensive comments made towards Barnard women. So basically a typical night in Carman.

The mastermind behind this video, Kevin Karn, is still making movies but the rest of the stars remain unnamed. If you recognize yourself (literally not figuratively) in this video, email us at tips@bwog.com for honor and glory. Also, don’t forget to catch the annual Bacchanal 4/20 Screening at Ancel Plaza, 8 pm. It’s Pineapple Express.

“The Meanest, Rottenest Landlord”: CAGe Leads Discussion On Manhattanville

1973453_10201985823342489_7270227400612543939_oYesterday afternoon, Columbia’s Coalition Against Gentrification (CAGe) held a conference about the local implications Columbia’s Manhattanville expansion. Manhattanville Maven Ali Sawyer attended the conference.

I think of Columbia, first and foremost, as a university—guilty of questionable administrative actions (or lack thereof) sometimes, sure, but also a hub for education and events that generally benefits the Morningside Heights community. You probably wouldn’t call my perception particularly disputable. But today, I was presented with a different picture of Columbia as a ruthless real estate giant, colonizing West Harlem without regard for the human beings who reside there. I was taken aback. We know that Columbia prioritizes maintaining a good PR image—based on how little I knew about this issue before, I would say they’re doing a pretty good job.

The event began with an opening speech by Professor Steven Gregory of Columbia’s Anthropology and African-American Studies departments. Professor Gregory presented a history of Columbia’s expansion plans, revealing how much longer this struggle has existed than I’d realized. Columbia’s administration has had their eye on Manhattanville for decades.

One of Professor Gregory’s main concerns was how the university deceitfully seeks and then ignores community input on its expansion plans. While it accepts community input on a surface level, it doesn’t allow it to influence their projects in any meaningful way. This disturbing habit of the university reflects its concern for good PR above human beings, a major theme of this meeting.

By spending millions on consultants and lobbying, Professor Gregory said, Columbia disempowers community organizations that lack the funds to keep up. This news was horrifying to me: my tuition dollars are feeding this expansion monster.

Back in 2008, Columbia hired companies EarthTech and AKRF to conduct studies on the environmental conditions of Manhattanville. The EarthTech report relies on visual observations like “ubiquitous roll-down gates” and “an almost complete lack of trees and vegetation” to declare Manhattanville a “blighted” area. The report ignored the social, economic, and historical richness of the area because of some obnoxious gates and a dearth of trees. Based on this logic, all of Manhattan, save perhaps Central Park, must be “blighted.”

Nice one, Columbia.

Bucket List: Venezuela, Rocket Science, Janet Mock, Stretch Johnson

Bucket List represents the unbelievable intellectual privilege we enjoy as Columbia students. We do our very best to bring to your attention important guest lecturers and special events on campus. Our recommendations for are below and the full list is after the jump.

Recommended.

  • ““What is Happening in Venezuela? Student Movements, Protest & State Action”: A Public Discussion with Juan Requesens, Yeiker Guerra, Ernesto Rangel, Daniel Wilkinson, and Jose Moya” Monday April 21, 7:30, 417 IAB.
  • “The new edge of rocket science: mohawk guy Bobak Ferdowsi” Wednesday April 23, 11:30-1:00 PM, Davis Auditorium.
  • “Redefining Realness: A Salon in Honor of Janet Mock” Wednesday April 23, 6:30-8:00 PM, Sulzberger Parlor. Janet Mock, Brittney Cooper, Che Gossett, Reina Gossett, CeCe Mcdonald, and Mey Valdivia Rude.
  • “A Dancer in the Revolution: Stretch Johnson, Harlem Communist at the Cotton Club” Thursday 24, 7:00-9:00, Butler Room 523. Eve Boutilié-Oxby, Kevin Fellezs, Robert O’Meally, Mark Naison.

More Fun to be Had

Bwoglines: Holding Down The Fort Edition
hawtboxin

Bwog is basically going to do this today.

Hey look! It’s Bwog in the news, bringing you lovely pictures of Dante De Blasio’s college tour. Bwog might have taken some selfies too but those are personal. (NY Daily News).

The man who attacked Columbia Professor Prabhjot Singh has been arrested and charged with a hate crime. The attack occurred in September. (Seattle PI).

Seems like Republicans hate the Core. But seems like they pretty much hate everything about the University of Havana-North. The “Obamacore” stays. (NY Times).

On fast-food advertising. (Huffington Post).

Image via ShutterStock.

Skootch Comedy: As Awkward As They Are Hilarious

Columbia College senior Luke Mones moonlights as a funny man for the comedy troupe Skootch Comedy. Some of their videos have recently been featured on Funny or Die and College Humor, including their most recent production: Dog Lady. This crew is sure to get a laugh, after all Luke Mones is one of the masterminds behind the short film Early Decision. Their Youtube channel is likewise filled with lols, especially Bwog’s personal favorite video of theirs, BuzzFeed Intervention: