Matthew Schantz

Part of the BWorld, Matt Schantz.

Name, Hometown, School: Matthew Schantz, Bryn Mawr, PA, CC; Russian Literature & English

Claim to fame? Bad puns, gross tofu, dick jokes.

Where are you going? After writing a thesis on the foundational works of Socialist Realist literature, I’m doing the only thing that makes sense—writing agitprop for a Left-wing publishing house in Brooklyn. After that, who knows!

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. Make time to hang out/ make out/ chill out/ space out/ bro out. It’s important!
   
2. In the final scene of Anna Karenina one of the main characters is strolling along when he has a revelation: He resolves to change everything about his life, to live with the utmost moral scrutiny, to treat everyone with absolute respect. Moments later, he’s in his carriage and finds himself cursing the cab driver. After beating himself up for not living up to his plan to treat everyone fairly, he realizes that’s ok. He has failed but will try again. Lesson: Dream up wild manifestos of self-betterment and plans to change the world, but don’t get too upset when you and others inevitably fail to live up to your new standards. Keep trying. And try to treat everyone with the same forgiving spirit with which you would like to be treated—they’re trying too.
3. Try to keep a sense of humor in everything you do. If you’re taking yourself so seriously that you can’t laugh at yourself, you’re probably not being critical of what you’re doing. There’s also a good chance that you’re no fun.

Back in my day… There were fewer ways to share pictures of your lunch via social media and Puppy Cops were still together.

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: I don’t think my existence is any more justified/ needs any more justification than anyone else’s. 

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Illustrations by Elisa Mirkil

Another article from the May issue of The Blue and White. Read on forthe final installment of managing editor Anna Bahr’s three-part series on the student debt at Columbia. This last part looks at General Studies. To review the first two pieces, which examine student loans in CC/SEAS and financial aid for international students, please visit theblueandwhite.org.

Just two years ago, Peter Awn, Dean of the School of General Studies, described the limited financial aid available to GS students as “untenable.” That year, GS students received, “percentage-wise, functionally half the financial aid dollars that [were] available to Columbia College students,” a dearth cornering GS undergrads into a future of student debt. Today, GS has surpassed its $25 million fundraising goal as part of the university-wide Campaign for Undergraduate Education—92 percent of which Awn estimates will expand the aid pool in the form of scholarships and grants. With this addition, he believes “the school has turned a corner.”

Awn’s optimism for the future of Columbia’s nontraditional undergraduate college surprised me. Nearly every GS student I interviewed shared a common grievance—the same frustration echoed in opinion pieces in the Spectator and desperate Bwog comments for years—that the value of a Columbia degree is compromised when it demands that scholars be borrowers.

When Hal Levy, GS ’14, graduates, he will owe nearly $160,000 in private student loans. “If I don’t go bankrupt, at the very least I will have no spending money for ten years. I’ll probably be wearing these same ratty clothes, trying to pay off my loans,” he sighed. GS prides itself on being one of a kind—a unique education, nonexistent at other Ivies, in which a diverse collection of nontraditional students earn traditional bachelor’s degrees. But its current program remains a feasible option for only one kind of student: he who can readily afford it. (more…)

Chris Silverberg

Name, Hometown, School: Chris Silverberg, Dallas, Texas, Columbia College.

Claim to fame? Lots of theater and singing on campus, much of it with KCST, The Varsity Show (acted in 117, directed V119), and Nonsequitur. Showing up 10 minutes late to meetings, rehearsals, etc. Skipping whatever it was you asked me to do to do VShow instead. Clogging your news feed with the Chris Silverberg All-Nighter Liveblog™. All that said, at heart, I’m just a Barnard Boy.

Where are you going? Home to Dallas for a while, then back to NYC for a while (depending on how bearable/unbearable I find Texas), then off to England for two years to teach a British boys’ boarding school. I’m practicing my Robin Williams/Sidney Poitier impression right now.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. The Circle of Admiration. No matter who you are at Columbia, there is someone that you admire, about whom you think, “wow, I would be so much better/happier/cooler/more interesting/more accomplished/more whatever if I were like that person.” But what you don’t realize is that there is someone that person says the same thing about. And there is someone saying that same thing about you. And so we’re all in a huge circle of inadequacy/admiration, but remembering that we’re all in it together sometimes helps. (By the way, someone once told me that would make for a pretty awesome vshow number. You’re welcome, 120).
   
2. Every experience is a resource, including college/Columbia as a whole, and it’s your right and privilege to take from that resource what you want/need/can gain from it, so long as you aren’t hurting anyone as you do so. At a certain point, I figured out that what I needed from Columbia wasn’t really the intellectual stimulation I got from classes during my first two or three years, and what I needed was to learn how to interact with people better, how to lead people, etc. So I stopped going to class and started directing plays. (Disclaimer for future employers: I mean, I still went to class… sometimes). But I wasted a lot of time feeling bad about that—thank God for the friends who helped me figure it all out.
3. People are really great, and at the end of they day other people are what counts and basically nothing else does, so make sure you put the people around you first and it’ll be hard to screw up too bad.

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Mary Byers

Bwog staff has (for the most part) descended into summer hibernation.  To celebrate both this resting period and the Class of ’13′s impending graduation ceremonies, we will exclusively be publishing Senior Wisdoms (along with a Blue and White piece or two that we really enjoyed) for the rest of the week.  First up today: Queen of SEAS Mary Byers.

Name, Hometown, School: Mary Byers. Portland, OR. SEAS.

Claim to fame? SEAS 2013 Class President for four years running (freshman year, Carman 6 ~*~shoutout~*~ began calling me the Queen of SEAS and I’ve shamelessly never really stopped anyone since), COÖP enthusiast, and I achieved the dream of having my own spread in the Columbia Blue Guide.

Oh and for some reason GreyStone Apartments is using my face on their CUID in their colorful banner ad on the right side of Bwog, which is totally weird.  Is that a claim to fame??

Where are you going? Returning to my Pacific Northwest roots! Moving to Seattle, WA to work for Amazon.com

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. Everybody here is at least a little neurotic in their own special way.  People manifest it differently, and there’s something to learn from everyone.
   
2. You must take risks at Columbia.  This is not the place to play it safe.
3. Life at Columbia gets a lot easier when you check your FOMO at the door.  There are far too many things to do and too many people to see here to spend your time wondering where you could have gone or who you could have hung out with last night.  Facebook doesn’t really help with this at all, but it helps to realize that people are probably trying to make it look like they’re having more fun than you anyway.

Back in my day… The Center for Student Advising didn’t have as much glass paneling, it was a lot harder to print stuff on campus (thank you Print@CU + a special nod to D.Hu for OwlPrinters), and upperclassmen were jealous of our SEAS beanies.

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David Fine

Here we have one of Bwog’s favorite green sock wearers: David Fine.

Name, Hometown, School: David Fine, Dallas, TX, CC

Claim to fame? Editor of The Current, wearer of green socks, SGB chair.

Where are you going? Working in New York, occasionally reliving the glory days with fellow CU alumni on Low Steps heckling current students.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. Everyone talks about a triangle with work, sleep, and socializing at each corner, saying you need to pick two points to succeed. That is the biggest load of codswallop you’ll hear here (and there’s certainly a lot of codswallop floating around, least of which is my own). Don’t make charts for how you should live your life. Instead, figure out what balance works for you and stick with it. When it stops working for you, change it—even in the same day, even in the same hour! The stuff that we call socializing here should enhance every other aspect of your time at Columbia, especially academics. In sum: fret less about how you should do Columbia, and just do it.
2. All is fair in love and war (with administrators) and finding open booths at 1020. It’s the last that you truly must perfect if you’re to have any success at all. Here’s a good story that explains all three. I love Barnard, I think it’s the best. When last semester Barnard Student Life imposed a pre-approval on student fliers, as SGB chair I knew it was my job to help fix something I love. I sat down with a Barnard administrator for over an hour trying to explain that this policy was bad and that they wouldn’t win a fight with SGB or other student groups over this. As the meeting was winding down, the administrator sincerely looked me in the eye and pleaded, “I hope I could’ve said something in this meeting that would avoid you opposing us on this.” I said something like, “suspend the policy immediately and work with us on creating a new one.” The administrator deadpanned, “we won’t do that.” We both looked at each other and kind of shrugged, shook hands, and went our separate ways. It was basically a declaration of war. Less than a week after that meeting Barnard had repealed the policy. So, if you’re keeping track, I’ve got love (for Barnard) and war (with administrators), what does this have to do with 1020 booths? The first rule of securing 1020 booths is that when you jump into a just emptied booth, you must stare down any would-be booth thieves without blinking. You must be vigilant and you must be steadfast in your commitment to the booth. I applied the same principles when faced with obstinate administrators, broken bureaucracy, and intransigent interests at Columbia. Everything I learned worth knowing, I learned at 1020. (more…)

What you should prep for

Underclassmen have to be out of housing by noon tomorrow (eek!!!), but there’s still tonight to live it up, get on with your bad self, and appreciate Columbia culture.  To help with all three of them, the band Sun Looks Down (Diana Flanagan, CC’15, David Su, Spencer Horstman, Jacob Sunshine, all CC’14) is putting on a last concert tonight at 9 pm in 112 Dodge Hall.  The concert will also showcase Taylor Simone, CC’14, and Wheatchief (David Beal, Joe Bucciero, and Michael Blair, all CC’15).  Get out there and have some fun before it all comes to an end and you have to go back to the suburbs where all your high school friends are still putting on crappy basement concerts covering Blink 182.

IT via Shutterstock

Christine Liu

Hear from Christine Liu, co-president of Engineers Without Borders.

Name, Hometown, School: Christine Liu, Nutley, NJ, SEAS (Chemical Engineering)

Claim to fame? Being the first to die in the 2010 CU Assassins games, Co-President of a silly group of passionate engineers. I’ve been told I make funny faces.

Where are you going? Some streets down and a few avenues over, working at one of those consulting firms until I figure out what to do with the rest of my life. But before that, Guatemala to work at an NGO and play with small children!

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. It’s ok to fail. I got the lowest midterm grade in my freshman year Adv Gen Chem course and almost failed a course Junior year and am still somehow graduating employed. I probably learned the most from my own failures during my time here and how to bounce back from a seemingly hopeless situation.
2. Smile and say hi to people you’ve met when you pass them. It’s polite and beats pretending to read a non-existent text. My peers are what made my experience at Columbia, more than my actual classes and professors.
3. Don’t be afraid to quit things. College is a time to explore and figure out what makes you, you. If something isn’t making you happy (an activity, a friend group, a major), don’t be afraid to drop it and focus on something else. Yes, even in SEAS it’s possible to change your major/minors up to a certain point. Find what you love and stick with that.

Back in my day… People paid full price for a Deluxe burger, Broadway between 119th and 120th was a constant construction zone, JJ’s chicken fingers and fries weren’t bottomless and each bite was savored

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: Engineers Without Borders. (Sigma Omega Beta), Meh, Moo

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Daniel Bonner

Name, Hometown, School: Daniel Bonner; Johannesburg, South Africa and Dallas, Texas, USA; Columbia College

Claim to fame? Gave you $$ as SGB Vice Chair, spent it as Hillel & Yavneh Prez. Founder, BonnerJams90 Inc.

Where are you going? Staying in the city to work, finally explore below 110th street, and see how long I can stay away from College Walk after graduation (1-2 days, tops – see instagram)

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. In case you haven’t heard me scream this from the Sundial before: things will never be this good. That’s not meant to be depressing — life will be awesome. But rarely, if ever, will you once again have this amount of time to stay up all night “writing a paper” but really just enjoying one extended life talk with friends; to plan a day of activities and land up running into a friend and spend it instead sitting on Low Steps; to introduce yourself to some random person you’ve always wanted to meet and gain a lifelong friend…you graduate from here with a Columbia degree, which is cool, but also with a more intangible, though much more meaningful group of Columbia friends. Would I take out those loans again for the degree? I think so. But for the friends? No question about it.
   
2. Speaking of time – I learned not to waste it at the package center. One great option offered last year – order packages to your friends mailboxes and be grateful when they bring your stuff back. But if it’s Amazon, order your stuff to an amazon locker at Rite Aid. You just walk in, punch in a code, and voila. The stuff always arrives on time. It’s amazing. All good if you ignore everything else in this senior wisdom — but follow this advice. (more…)

Steele Sternberg

First up today: Steele Sternberg, future teacher extraordinaire: 

Name, Hometown, School: Steele Sternberg, Denver, Colorado (i.e., the greatest place in the universe), CC

Claim to fame? I went through all of Columbia without pulling an all-nighter for academic-related reasons. I worked with a number of really great groups on campus including Academic Success Programs, COÖP, Latenite Theatre, the Spectator Editorial Board, and the URC. You have also probably heard me yelling far too loudly about something at some point.

Where are you going? I’m going to teach or, more accurately, learn how to teach! I’m doing this very cool new program where you teach at a boarding school for two years and get a master’s in education from the University of Pennsylvania (my loyalties shall always lie with Alma). I’ll be moving from NYC to rural Connecticut for the job. It’s going to be a change, but no loss of restaurant options can make up for the number of new stars I’ll be able to see at night.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. Every day when you wake up and walk out the door you have to power to make someone else’s day really awesome or really shitty. As much as we all like to imagine ourselves as incredibly independent and self-sufficient people, I have found that, in my own experience at least, I am incredibly dependent on the kindness and support of my friends to make or break my experience here. It’s somewhat frightening to think that you may have that much importance in the happiness and success of others, but it can also be incredibly empowering to realize that, every day, you have the opportunity to make someone else feel incredibly valued and appreciated.
   
2. Our collective ability to experience nostalgia for things from the 90’s like Space Jam and denim is unparalleled and provides infinite entertainment.
3. It is actually okay to talk to other people about your feelings! When I came to Columbia I thought that my emotions were merely superficial ailments that ought to be cast aside in my pursuit of some kind of purely rational perfection. That was both naïve and detrimental to my mental health. Learning how to talk about your psychology can open up much deeper and more substantive relationships with other people and help your own health in the process.

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How you feel if you have a Friday final.

Why so long? Because time. I have a lot of it now.

Bwoglines: A group of millionaires, known as The Long Now Foundation, are building a 10,000 year clock inside a mountain in Texas. It is inspired by the “The Millenium Clock,” written by Danny Hills for Wired in 1986. (Vice)

Time marches on – and right over an ancient Mayan pyramid. And by marched we mean turned to gravel for use on a “road project.” Oops! (The Guardian)

Procrastination: Sex is a part of the natural world. It has always and will always be a focus in our lives. That said, the natural world is also full of super weird animal penasia! Every link is 100% Bwog-certified worth it. (Vice)

Queens of the Stone Age’s eagerly anticipated comeback album, “…Like Clockwork,” comes out on June 4th. Until then, you can enjoy an interwoven video series (on-loop) that has been plucked straight from your nightmares and is rife with enough hellish imagery to make you miss the nighttime company of even the most annoying of Carman suitemates.

Join Dueling Network fo’ FREE! Live out all your “Heart-of-the-Card” fantasies. If you’re serious, challenge Bwog to a duel. We’ll be waiting.

…Or, you know, you could read a book.

Finals Tip: Stop. Go get drunk like all the other kids.

Overheard: Little boy pointing at the structure in front of Buler (pre-completion): Look! They’re building a spaceship!

To Infinity and Beyond, Seniors.

The infinitesimal nature of our existence via Shutterstock

Claire Duvallet

For the last Senior Wisdom of the day we have Claire Duvallet, who made your life a lot better, even if you didn’t realize it.

Name, Hometown, School: Claire Duvallet; Austin, TX (mostly); SEAS BME

Claim to fame? Puppies, lawns, and SEAS study abroad

Where are you going? Phnom Penh, Cambodia to work for Engineering World Health as a Luce Scholar next year. Then MIT for my Ph.D. in biological engineering. Hurray for not having to make any life decisions till next decade!

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1.  Quality >> quantity. This goes for words, friends, and time spent studying.
2. Happiness deserves a spot on your to-do list, and your well-being should be scheduled into your life as much as your millions of problem sets or essays. The amount of work you’ll get done past a certain time at night is less than the amount you’ll gain from your increased productivity the next day because you’re happy that you slept or went out with friends or whatever.
3. If you want something, ask for it (nicely)! Also and related, every choice you make is two choices: the choice and its consequences. Bitching without acting means that you essentially choose and accept that whatever you’re complaining about is gonna keeping being what it is. Approach individuals in good faith and you’ll be astounded by the response. Administrators at Columbia DO care, it just gets lost somewhere in the trickle-down. When Carolyn and I spoke to the groundskeeper about the lawns, he said he’d never heard these concerns from students before–actually it’s probably just that no one had ever approached him without having already decided he was the enemy (he’s not! He’s such a grandpa!!). Be willing to listen and understand the other side of the story and you’ll see that yours gets through so much easier.

Back in my day…John Jay had waffles err’day, green flags were a myth, and SEAS study abroad seemed impossible.

Justify your existence in 30 words or fewer: I believe stories are the currency of life and strive to live accordingly. Also Goldfarb has a picture of me on his phone and free pens exist because of me.

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Illustration by Leila Mgaloblishvili, CC ’16

One more piece from the May issue of The Blue and White: a Campus Character. Daniel Stone profiles University Senator Richard Sun. You can still grab a copy in Lerner. Or read the damn thing online.

At the suggestion of Richard Sun, CC ’13, we meet in the gaudily adorned lobby of Le Parker Meridian on 56th Street off 6th Avenue. Below five hundred dollar-a-night rooms and next to non-functional renaissance columns, a maroon curtain hides the Burger Joint. Waiting in the long line to get in, Sun tells me he likes the place partly because you “wouldn’t expect to find a relaxed and greasy burger joint at the heart of the hotel.” (It’s also near Brooks Brothers, where he has been shopping and the fare’s good.) Inside the cramped restaurant, as if to hide the fact that the hotel also runs it, graffiti uniformly covers the walls. Prices are written on cardboard boxes in marker. He orders two cheeseburgers and a milkshake. When it turns out they have run out of milkshakes, he opts for water. Then, we sit.

Sun wears many hats. At Columbia, most know him as one of the three University Senators who represent Columbia College, the man who knocked on hundreds of doors to secure victory in his campaign last year. Those who miss his semi-regular USenate email updates may know him as an RA in Carman, Economics TA, brother of Sigma Phi Epsilon, or member of the Ski Team. Many are also familiar with his collection of hard-to-get internships, including a semester in the White House and a summer working for Columbia’s favorite consulting firm, McKinsey & Company. In the past four years, Sun has garnered—along with his impressive resume—a complicated reputation as a public figure on campus. (more…)

What makes you happy?

It’s not unusual to wake up after a night at 1020 with some unexpected texts on your phone. In Bwog’s case, we woke up to find an interview in voice memo form. On Tuesday, two adventurous seniors, Anna and Diana (anonymity requested), CC and SEAS’13, decided to stay in 1020 from opening to closing. At 2:20 am, 10 hours and 20 minutes into their stay, Bwog sat down at the front table to check in with them.

Bwog: How long have you been at 1020? 

Diana: 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 1, 2…10 hours!

Anna: 10 hours and 20 minutes.  Since 4 o’clock, opening time.

Bwog: And how long are you going to be here till?

Anna and Diana: Until it closes! [agonized shouts]

Anna: I thought it was gonna be 3, but considering the crowd that’s come out, I think it’s gonna be more like 4:30. I think last call will be 3:50 and everyone will be gone by 4:30.

Diana: Are we gonna be the last people here?

Anna: I think so, yeah.

Diana: I assumed we would.

Anna: It’s all a work in progress.

Bwog: When did you come up with this idea?

Anna: Two nights ago!

Diana: We wanted to do it for a long time, and then we just were like “fuuuuck, let’s do it.”

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Meriam Raouf

For the second Senior Wisdom of the day we present Meriam Raouf, who takes “30 words or fewer” literally and “one thing to do” less so.

Name, Hometown, School: Meriam Raouf – Flakes, New Jersey – CC

Claim to fame? I half-heartedly interned for KCR like 1 semester a year, and never took the test, so there’s that. I think I got nominated because I may or may not have pooped in the pool during my swim test.  I lived in the Writer’s House in Harmony, I usually have tequila with me at Quarto readings.

Where are you going? You’re not the boss of me.

Three things you learned at Columbia:

1. The only thing dumber than wearing a bikini on campus on a brisk day in May, is discussing it. In fact, the only thing dumber than doing any dumb thing, is discussing it. It’s like you didn’t even see Mean Girls.
   
2. If food, mice. Every damn time.
3. If you make a joke, and it is too much for your friends, and this happens a lot, and you feel weird about it, make new friends, not new jokes. Your second joke will be worse and your second friend will be better.

Back in my day… Well first of all, John Jay had Hogwarts lighting. The turnstile at Lerner was fucked up so that if you swiped your ID without paying attention to the click, it would clothesline you right in the crotch. It was funny to watch people do–I’m pretty sad they fixed that. 1020 didn’t dare have a LINE, let alone a ROPE for that line, the nerve. The artist formally known as Campo was just Campo, a place where freshmen could get drunk in the morning, and a half-decent second base at night. Women were not allowed to go to Columbia, Four-Loko was not Three-Loko, and not a single igloo was left un-hotboxed.

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In the course of studying, Bwog discovered some questionable commentary in notes and readings.  See how bad we are at being students: