In the grand tradition of Columbia media outlets, CTV News has released a guide to everything you need to know to go here, an 11-minute broadcast that’s been split into six bite-sized videos for your viewing convenience. Bwog brings you the CliffNotes to the highlights.

Most Useful: Year in Review

Judging by the class of 2011 Facebook community, there’s a chance that most incoming freshmen have been eagerly tracking any and all Columbia-related news for the past year. For anyone who hasn’t, this video summarizes what CTV has deemed to be “the biggest events that” transpired between fall 2006 and spring 2007 (read: “One scandal after another”). Watch this if you’ve somehow forgotten about the  Minutemen, if you want to see a dramatic cut from a Columbia staff webpage that includes a picture of disgraced former Associate Dean of Financial Aid David Charlow to a webpage that’s Charlow-less, or if you like gratuitous firedancing clips.

Most Awkward Ending: Student Government

“And the votes are in: student government wins as one of the best ways to get

involved in leadership on campus. So what are you waiting for? The polls are


Most Heartwarming: Senior Advice

Faces from the past! Awww.

Least Useful: Tie between Eating in Morningside Heights and Extracurricular Activities

The main problem with Extracurricular Activities is that it’s too vague; after noting that there are “more than 200 student clubs on campus,” CTV reporter Allison Yang proceeds to quickly list a few as the camera lingers over their websites. In “Eating,” Jason Alarcon rev
eals that our neighborhood is home to several restaurants “and even supermarkets!” He then randomly spotlights a few restaurants in the Columbia area, including Strokos, Artopolis (which apparently serves ‘savory desserts,’ a phrase any Top Chef aficionado will recognize as an oxymoron), and Massawa. This video’s greatest crime is perpetuating the myth that there’s anything redeeming about Koronet slices other than being sickeningly huge.

Longest Clip of Austin Quigley Speaking:
Administrators to Know

Umm… yeah.