Terrible 12s, you haven’t even set foot on campus yet and already the whole Internet is abuzz with your goings-on.
In fairness, this latest outburst comes not from a Terrible 12 himself, but from his embarrassing mother, who (according to Craigstlist via Gawker) is looking hire a babysitter for him, for “support” — “support” apparently meaning picking up his dry cleaning, fetching things for his apartment (Carman double?) and scheduling his doctors appointments (walking to health services?).
Our new classmate will start Columbia in the fall, lives on 84th between Park and Lexington, has five brothers and sisters, and no nanny. All the job requires is “PERFECT English” and “SOME college,” meaning that you could be making 60-75k/year babysitting your own classmate.
41 Comments
@Actually... I wouldn’t consider myself “super-independent” but I damn sure wouldn’t give my parents credit for my getting here. Don’t get me wrong my parents are great, but simply for “middle-class” parenting meaning providing a roof and food for me while I took care of my own future. I did my extra-curriculars because i wanted to not because my mom was obsessed with getting me into a good school. Never took SAT prep courses, did summer programs etc. It all ultimately falls on what the kid wants. I would never want my parents to go through all of these unnecessary extremes for something that I should want to do myself.
@Juelz 84 and park is pussy.
1 40 deuce all day eryday, harlem world, oooooooooooooow
@#4 of 5 By the time these parents have their 4th and 5th children in college, they won’t give a crap.
The only time my parents have called me at school was to say that they were going on vacation and I needed to feed the cat.
I feel unloved…
@red Anyway, this guy lives 15 minutes away from campus and he needs “support” for “going off to college?”
@This woman is just the logical extension of most other parents now. Let’s be honest, a lot of us didn’t schedule our own doctor’s appointments freshman year of college. And a lot of parents are sending constant care packages and “checking in” 24/7.
Even if this kid went and lived in Carman and had his mom that close and available, you really think he would be doing his own laundry?
(Psst…it’s an epidemic…)
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/26/nyregion/26camp.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin
@How odd... Really? I got one visit, and I bussed home by myself, internationally, through Montreal at the middle of the night.
And I hauled myself to health services when I got so high that I lost my tactile perception for a week, thank you very much.
Although I did get some nice chocolate in the mail.
Maybe it’s them rich folk. They’ve got to keep it down a little. Maybe they’re overcompensating for ignoring the little runts.
@green It really is commendable that you were mature enough to get yourself so high.
@I think... …it’s mostly the competition to get your kids into a good college. Make sure they do enough extra-curriculars, make sure they get perfect grades, make sure they go to good summer programs, SAT prep courses…micromanage, micromanage, micromanage…
Unless your sixteen-year-old is super-independent and getting themselves into Harvard without any parental help.
@ugh i’m not your guy, fag. wow that was completely out of line.
@... i had friends back in sf that nannied. it’s a good gig… one girl i know put herself through school with it.
@flat broke ‘you could be making 60-75k/year babysitting your own classmate.’
sure, i agree, it’s ridiculous… but where do i sign up? i don’t know about you guy, but i’m not at all above doing some spoiled kid’s chores. for enough money.
@can't even type. or you GUYS, even.
@Stephen Abootman I’m not your guy, buddy!
@Hey! I’m not your buddy, friend!
@it had to be done I’m not your friend, guy!
@I agree I’d totally do it.
@Adam Nobler If there’s a bustle in your hedgefund,
Don’t be alarmed now.
@and why shouldn’t a career women with five kids have a babysitter? dumb
@duh everyone knows women with “careers” have their vaginas sewn shut. You’d think at least THAT is common knowledge.
@babysitter same as house slave? dumb
@mildly stupid AHAHAHAHAHA
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w00t.
@hahah The thing which is weird about this post and makes me think it’s more of a parody than something real is the fact that two parents like this would have FIVE CHILDREN.
Five children? Seriously, tell me what fashionista and hedge fund manager would have five children in this day and age. I doubt they even have enough time to have had sex five times in their marriage if this was a real couple.
@hmmm global family (a la brangelina)?
@no, she just has a misplaced sense of helping others sometimes!
@mildly stupid I just wanted to warn the poor lady…
@mildly stupid I responded with the following email.
From my CU account.
She’s probably a benefactor.
Shit.
“As a Columbia student myself, I would recommend that you cut off your son’s nanny services. There are laundry services on campus that I’m sure would be happy to visit an apartment. I believe your son will develop a huge resentment if he is still being “parented” at university age. Moreover, Columbia highlights independence and resourcefulness as important qualities in a student, and methinks that a nineteen-year-old who can’t schedule his own trips to the doctor would fail on said count.
Also, imagine the following conversation.
“Cool, dude, you have your own place!”
“Er, yeah.”
“Hey, who is that remarkably attractive woman with little college who is earning more that you will your first year out of Columbia? I hope you’re banging her!”
“Er, no. That’s my nanny. Mommy says she can’t have sex with me.”
It’ll happen.
This isn’t meant to be snarky in the least. It’s a legitimate concern. Just looking out for the class of 2012.”
@wow you do have balls and sound like a total douche.
but you know what, it probably is for the best.
@Perfect English The period goes inside the quotation mark. Those who live in glass houses…
@Well Technically #9 did not claim to have perfect English either, but just wanted to point out the fact that Bwog didn’t.
Also another thing Bwog got wrong: the person they’re looking for must be available at very particular hours, six days a week if not seven.
I doubt very much a Columbia freshman, even those with Rhodes in their eyes, has enough time or stamina for that amount of commitment in addition to classes…
@... I think Bwog was kidding about a CU student actually taking the position…
@Glass Houses Periods don’t necessarily have to go inside quotation marks.
@BWOG, Come On Did you actually read the listing?
1. It’s a nanny for the whole family.
2. The family has 5 children, so the 2012er has 4 siblings.
3. 84th between Park and Lex is the “second apartment” offered at reduced rent to the nanny.
Still hilarious, but BWOG is disqualified for not having perfect English.
Also of note: the 2nd son apparently “doesn’t need to be cared for. He will pretty much look after himself”. And the college freshman can’t do this?
@wow Funniest thing I’ve read in a while.
@jason Guys! Lay off my mom!
@i'm contemplating going through the interview process just to show up and deck that douchebag in the face. then smear his bloody face all over the apartment. And take a dump on their living room carpet for good measure, cause, you know, the rest of us are simply uncivilized ogres.
@a prize to be named later for the first to out this spoiled 12er, and/or get him to share his servant with others.
@YEAH lets go beat him up!
@further confirmation that everyone working in the finance world sucks.
@Right on You’re right man – everyone in the finance world sucks, and you rule. That’s right, you RULE! How does it feel to be King, sir? Hmm? You must be very proud of your self-righteous little self.
@wild guess That this is written by somebody who works in finance and is insecure enough about the career path to have to defend themselves so vehemently
@.... Wow, this makes me sick on so many levels. First, anyone working high up in the fashion industry. Second, anyone working high up in the hedge fund industry. Third, people who think they are so different from the rest of us that they require the equivalent of house slaves. Fourth, anyone who requires a nanny after the age of six. Fifth, blackberries…just…blackberries. Sixth, the woman assumes she has perfect English, which is dubious. And finally, seventh, using the word “fetch.” Yes, reminds me of dogs, slaves, and servants. Thanks for the daily dose of ire bwog!