Connect with us

All Articles

Opening Remarks: Inauguration Edition

Bwog humbly presents our traditional anthology of professors’ opening remarks. Remember to send any overheards tomorrow to

Morris Rossabi, History of the Mongols

“A visitor to Mongolia once came upon a Mongolian woman whom he

thought had enormous breasts that seemed to be moving. Upon further

investigation, he found that the woman was nursing a young lamb.” Rossabi then explained this story showed the strong relation between man and animal in Mongolia.

Marcellus Andrews, Intro to Economic Reasoning (Barnard)

“So as you can see, I’m an old black man. And today is a day where old black men tend to get weepy. I’m ugly when I cry, so I’ll restrain myself.”

Catherine Monk, Abnormal Behavior

Students were treated to one of Professor Monk’s choice music selections: namely, “Crazy” by Gnarls Barkley.

Richard Bulliet, History of the Modern Middle East

The Modernization of the Middle East similarly suggests that modernization is a precisely describable process by which each part of the world at its own pace will become like America. Which is a wonderful concept because America is, at least today, the most wonderful country in the world. Maybe it wasn’t yesterday, but…”

“The first meeting of the course is ‘the bullshit course,’… so this is basically the bullshit lecture”

“There will be things like ‘pick readings from the discussion section and write an essay about them. And you will think oh shit, I didn’t do the readings.'”

Write a comment

Your email address will not be published.



  • bulliet is says:

    @bulliet is THE MAN. ABSOLUTELY.

  • bulliet said says:

    @bulliet said the first lecture of the course is the “bullshit lecture”, not the bullshit course

  • Oh my says:

    @Oh my I love Marcellus Andrews.

  • orthographer says:

    @orthographer Bwog: his name is spelled Rossabi.

  • ummm says:

    @ummm Bulliet never said that last quote, Bwog.

    1. oh shit says:

      @oh shit he said something very close to it

  • Another Bulliet says:

    @Another Bulliet (Referring to Small Villages in Saudi Arabia) They’re kind of like the Muslim version of Idaho…to give a reference to Sarah Palin’s home state.

  • hey bwog says:

    @hey bwog whats up with cubmail?? got an email about an outage…

  • Have Your Say

    What should Bwog's new tagline be?

    View Results

    Loading ... Loading ...

    Recent Comments

    criminally underrated. takes me back lol (read more)
    Columbia University Marching Band To Dissolve Following Anonymous Confessions
    September 21, 2020
    wow this was really helpful. especially the tip where my mom varges in and says obama js in the phone. (read more)
    How To Impress Your Class Crush On Zoom
    September 21, 2020
    Meanwhile, back in REALITY: "Shootings are way up in many cities, e.g., NYC shootings are up 95%. But NYC murders (read more)
    Big Problems: Making Sense Of 2020 With Roxane Gay
    September 21, 2020

    Comment Policy

    The purpose of Bwog’s comment section is to facilitate honest and open discussion between members of the Columbia community. We encourage commenters to take advantage of—without abusing—the opportunity to engage in anonymous critical dialogue with other community members. A comment may be moderated if it contains:
    • A slur—defined as a pejorative derogatory phrase—based on ethnicity, race, gender, sexual orientation, ability, or spiritual belief
    • Hate speech
    • Unauthorized use of a person’s identity
    • Personal information about an individual
    • Baseless personal attacks on specific individuals
    • Spam or self-promotion
    • Copyright infringement
    • Libel
    • COVID-19 misinformation